Author Topic: Please add to this - I accomplished this today  (Read 4278 times)

HvnBound

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Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« on: March 10, 2015, 02:51:00 PM »
I started this thread on June 27, 2012 because just_me_1963 suggested it. In the beginning it was huge just to get out of bed so I wanted us newbies to have some place to put down what things we did to help others...

My post from that date -
Last night, before America's Got Talent, I went to the grocery store and bought eggs and sausage links - my husband's favorites - and for the first time since Thursday, May 3, cooked his favorites, three sausage links and three fried eggs and - ate them.

This morning, I brushed my hair, put on a headband, washed two loads of laundry, changed into clean clothes, made a sandwich of ham, cheese and mustard, ate it, went to a friend's house to help her out.

For those of you that this will help - please type in your accomplishments because I am struggling. I will need to hear of what you did. It will give me strength. I am all alone except for this wonderful widow who lost her husband almost 13 years ago.

Like someone told me - it does not matter if it is minor it is still an accomplishment. Be proud of what you did, no matter if it does not mean much to you - it will help someone else out.

Thanks to you all.
"It's time to start living the life you've imagined."

  --  Henry James

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order
to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you.
  -- Unknown

HvnBound

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2015, 06:15:37 PM »
There probably is no longer a use for this thread since there is another one for a daily/weekly goals....so with the old board, we can just let this thread die.
"It's time to start living the life you've imagined."

  --  Henry James

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order
to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you.
  -- Unknown

Jen

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #2 on: March 10, 2015, 08:22:32 PM »
I respectfully disagree! Goals are great, but they're not the same as accomplishments. We need a place to pat ourselves and each other on the back for the little victories-- I posted here when I was proud of myself for not melting down and becoming completely dysfunctional when I blew out a tire. Baby steps. I see a need for this thread, so can we please leave it?
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton

lcoxwell

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2015, 10:34:57 PM »
I agree with Jen, and in honor of this accomplishment thread, let me be the first to list my accomplishments for today.  Today was the one year anniversary of my Kenneth's death.  I went to work, I managed not to cry in front of my students, I went by his grave, I fed the dogs, and I cooked dinner for "the boy" (who is now 19, but will be forever dubbed "the boy", because that's what Kenneth always called him).  I also managed to put on clean clothes this morning, to comb my hair, and to brush my teeth.  Go me!   ;D
"The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude." - Thornton Wilder

Thank you, my dearest Kenneth, for loving me and for giving me the best 13 years of my life.

HvnBound

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #4 on: March 10, 2015, 10:58:08 PM »
Geez ladies, I had no idea that it still might help so never mind then. It makes me happy that it will live on to help others. Thank you.
"It's time to start living the life you've imagined."

  --  Henry James

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order
to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you.
  -- Unknown

Bluemoon15

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #5 on: March 11, 2015, 11:17:40 AM »
I, for one, am absolutely thrilled that you decided to leave this post up!  I have been taking baby steps of another kind since being diagnosed with fibromyalgia and an exacerbation of my valvular heart disease from childhood 12 years ago.  Now I must fight a two fronted war in the accomplishments theatre, health issues and this devastating, gut wrenching, lost land of widowhood.  Getting up in the morning IS an accomplishment, as is everything after that, whether it's getting dressed, household chores, doing our jobs, etc., even if we DON'T get through the day without crying!  No crying?  Bonus points!

If it's not health issues, it's yet another debilitating reason that is thrown in the mix.  Some people have young children, some are in the sandwich generation caring for an elderly parent, and I'm sure there are many more scenarios I haven't thought of yet.

I agree with Jen!  We must support each other's accomplishments, every little baby step!
I love you more...

Jen

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #6 on: March 11, 2015, 01:38:18 PM »
I dug through countless boxes of assorted crap, which I had hauled to the new house in January, stuck in the attic or garage, and didn't plan to look at again in the foreseeable future, and found my marriage license, my passport, and my kids' birth certificates. Along the way I found a bunch of stuff that would have sent me into total meltdown a few weeks back, but I soldiered through and even smiled at some of it. :)
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton

sdarrah1130

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2015, 03:47:22 PM »
14 days since E passed away.

Last night I baked chicken for dinner.

Today I actually went into the office for a half day. 

Sandy - E's wife
Sandy - E's Wife

"My Darlin, you are wonderful tonight......"

Jess

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #8 on: March 12, 2015, 08:42:22 PM »
14 days since E passed away.

Last night I baked chicken for dinner.

Today I actually went into the office for a half day. 

Sandy - E's wife

Sandy, not even joking, at 14 days those things are huge. I still couldn't eat solid food at 14 days out, much less consider cooking anything. I didn't return to work until I was about 25 days out and even then it was partial days from home. Remember, there is no right or wrong timetable. Do what you feel ready for when you feel ready for it and give yourself permission to act on the feeling that you are not ready for something should you ever feel it.
On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good. - Unknown

Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain by being joyous. - Hazrat Inayat Khan

Joe: 1979- 7/2014

keeptrying

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2015, 06:41:23 PM »
I got most kids in bed for the past two nights! Some nights I have all 6, and me being pregnant, there is no room. A lot of nights I have only 4, all nights I have 3. Past two nights I only have one in bed with me. Four months I have literally not had more than an hour of consistent sleep. - I am down to one kid in bed! To me, that is huge! I am hoping it lasts. - My next huge goal is going back to the original rule of no eating in the living room.. I really screwed up on that one. Just didn't seem worth the fight. If I can get this sleeping in your bed down for most kids.. Call me butter baby, cause I am on a roll!!!!

mixelated

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #10 on: March 19, 2015, 06:48:40 PM »
Today makes 3 months. It's one of those days I'm glad I'm a freelancer and work from home, because I can't imagine crying every five minutes in an office. Or working while blubbering.
  • I got work accomplished on 2 contracts.
    I made avocado chocolate chia pudding for breakfast.
    I picked out pictures and sent them for printing for his committal service.
    I had a salmon melt on a rice cake for lunch.
    I went to the grocery store (which means I also got dressed).

mixelated

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #11 on: March 19, 2015, 07:01:47 PM »
Keeptrying: ((((((HUGS))))) I can't imagine how you are run off your feet. If the kiddos feel safe enough to sleep on their own, I'd say that's a good development. I will be thinking of you tonight and hoping for a sense of security for you all.

Sandy: ((((((HUGS)))))) Good job...! I don't think I cooked anything for six weeks. Of course, I wasn't really eating anything either. When I did, I was nibbling on something my husband had cooked and put up or frozen, and crying the whole time.
Can't say I'm exactly cooking now - maybe once a week. I miss his cooking so much - he was a great cook. When I can do it without breaking down I'll put together all his recipes.

lcoxwell

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2015, 07:10:49 PM »
I had a very stressful situation arise at work, today.  One that, in earlier months, would have driven me to tears or caused a panic attack.  While it upset me, and I am still worried about how I am going to get the situation resolved, I managed to take deep breaths and carry on with my teaching for the remainder of the day, without falling completely apart and without having to take medication for anxiety.
"The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude." - Thornton Wilder

Thank you, my dearest Kenneth, for loving me and for giving me the best 13 years of my life.

sdarrah1130

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #13 on: March 21, 2015, 01:12:01 PM »
I cleaned my bathroom today.

Last week the attempt put me in a tailspin.  I kept reminding myself today that  I'm not washing him away and I will put things back where they belong.

Sandy -E's wife
Sandy - E's Wife

"My Darlin, you are wonderful tonight......"

Grammy

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Re: Please add to this - I accomplished this today
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2015, 06:04:03 PM »
The used to be Little things are now significant accomplishments.  I can use this thread right now.  So today I went grocery shopping and ran into my oldest sons ex-in-laws.  I tried to go the other direction but the other Grandma called out to me.  Let it be said, there were ##### thoughts going through my head and I somehow played nicely with others.

 Last week she called me up and told me, "After all Dear, You KNOW your not a Grandmother so Zoey must come to my house for Sunday dinner." I just hung up on her and told my son to deal with it.

 So running into her "On a date to a local festival and dinner with her loving Husband because Intimacy is so much better now that the kids are grown."

So my not telling these people from another reality how the world is, was a big accomplishment for the day.  And I showered and put on makeup so I did not scare people.  LOL!

(((((Hugs))))) and Love to All!

Grammy or Nanc

Be Gentle with Yourself