Author Topic: On line dating vents and laughs......  (Read 162262 times)

klim

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #675 on: August 03, 2016, 01:44:09 PM »
Ok which sites do you use???
People that don't know anything( my married friends) are trying to tell me which site s are for which type of dating. Seems they all have reputations. I suspect there might be better options depending on age as well.
I'm on the slightly older side of "young widow", I'm 54.
I know of 

OKCUPID
POF
TINDER
EHARMONY.

I know of MATCH but right now I'm being fiscal and not paying and they don't let you get too far.

So far I like POF.......
I get the most compliments from the junior set on OKCUPID
And my friends are telling me TINDER is for Hookups but it looks pretty similar to other sites.

OPinions?????      Experiences????

Momtojandj

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #676 on: August 03, 2016, 02:05:18 PM »
Klim
 You know the same ones I have used . I have to say from talking to single people what works in one area , doesn't always work in another. However , my two that I meet the most are pof and tinder. I do state on tinder, I'm not looking for a hookup. I like that since you go thru Facebook, tinder tells you if have have friends in common.  A lot of guys state on there that they aren't looking for a hookup either . Ps.. I went onto groupon and found 3 months for match for only 25 dollars.
"To love another person is to see the face of God "

Captains wife

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #677 on: August 03, 2016, 02:12:50 PM »
I have done ALOT of internet dating (ugh). I am in my 40s and I have not used Tinder but had friends that have used it and it hasn't led to anything but the odd date/friendship/hook-up.

I've tried OKC, EHarmony and Match. I actually thought OKC was pretty good in terms of the set up/profiles/extensive questions and number of people on the site but since its free you get a lot of scammers on there and undatables and I found I got "harassed" a lot on there. I also dated someone on there who was a complete liar.

eHarmony is a COMPLETE waste of time - its the most expensive, not great matches, a lot of "unreal" profiles on there and the initial back and forth correspondence (before you can email each other) plus inability to pick your matches makes it terrible to use for both men and women.

Match I find has the best selection of people to date but it costs and you still get a lot of creeps on there. I also HATE the Winks, Interested, Likes etc - its SOOO confusing! But I met my husband on Match in NYC so I am a little partial to it and I've had some decent dates from it (and some not so decent dates).I also think a paid service weeds out some of the scammers and really creepy people.  I also think it benefits from a wide membership, depending where you live.

I think there are some new dating sites that try and link you through your friends networks to meet men - I saw an app on Shark Tank plus there is OurTime (over 50 site my friend uses), EliteSingles (not tried it).

All the best as this is not easy although it can be fun ! 

RobFTC

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #678 on: August 03, 2016, 06:39:51 PM »
Can't delete, I guess?
« Last Edit: August 03, 2016, 10:32:08 PM by RobFTC »
There was something fishy about the butler.  I think he was a Pisces, probably working for scale.

sdarrah1130

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #679 on: August 04, 2016, 08:28:29 AM »
I met NG on Match 

First and last site...... I paid for the subscription only because I have never truly dated before and wanted to reach out of my comfort zone (2 mile radius of where I live)  LOL. 

I liked it because I was able to narrow my search criteria.  I searched widowers within 35 miles of my area.....  talk about out of the 2 mile radius.......

I met NG, fellow widower, gets me and we just Clicked. 

Good Luck to you.  Our hearts, minds and heads deserve to be happy. 
Sandy - E's Wife

"My Darlin, you are wonderful tonight......"

arneal

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #680 on: August 04, 2016, 10:41:26 AM »
Match and eHarmony were a waste of time for me. Like you, sdarrah, I wanted to reach outside my zone in various ways ... I didn't want to meet men who were only from within the site's prescribed age range or race/ethnicity. I joined a couple of interracial sites, which is where I met guy I've been seeing (and am interested in) and the texters. Speaking of which, the one texter popped up today after being silent for a few days. This is an interesting journey for sure!
Andree'

Seek peace, and pursue it - Psalm 34:14b

SunshineFL

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #681 on: August 04, 2016, 10:49:31 AM »
What is that definition of "insanity" - doing the same thing over again and expecting a different result?

Well, after several months detox from the online, most of this year actually, and witnessing the bravery of you supportive people on this thread, yesterday I thought I'd jump back in again (okc and pof) and give it a try.  It only takes that one good guy, right?

The "online vents and laughs" have already begun, but staying hopeful and positive.
Wish me luck - keep you posted.  ::)

MrsDan

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #682 on: August 04, 2016, 10:50:30 AM »
I met my boyfriend on OKCupid. I liked the interface of that site the best. I liked that it was more granular than the other sites. Like with match,  it would say someone liked music, but what kind? If that info was on there I couldn't find it. And on OKCupid the matches were broken down you could see which areas were most compatible. BF and I were a very high match overall, but I noticed that we were a ridiculously high match on ethics questions. To me that said a lot. What I didn't like about it is it deliberately doesn't show you all your matches. The only way you could see more matches was if you changed up the filter now and then. It worked out for me though. Actually, it's kind of funny, they have this "quickmatch" option, where you can scan info quickly without actually doing a full search opening someone's full profile. Every single time I did it, my boyfriend came up by like the second or third guy, and many times he popped up first.

I found Match and Zoosk a pain to use, and had heard that Tinder and POF were full of pervs and weirdos, although I never tried them. An I hate that Eharmony is a Christian site without  being transparent about it. I mean, I have no problem with faith based sites. Faith is important to a lot of people and in many cases probably a deal breaker. But at least be upfront about it, like Christian Mingle or J Date.
You are the Bear of my heart dear,
And nothing can take that away.

arneal

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #683 on: August 04, 2016, 11:53:30 AM »
That's interesting about eHarmony, MrsDan -- they have a commercial where the woman says she isn't religious and the guy says that's not a problem. Is there something overt about the faith aspect? I have faith as a component I'm looking for but haven't limited myself to a narrow view. Despite all that, eHarmony just didn't do it for me ...

Late afternoon update -- you all got me curious about this OKCupid so I went and made a profile. Folks sure are friendly over there lol! I got a few emails right away so we'll see. Took a chance and texted someone who had been trying to get my attention on the main site I've had a profile on; his spelling is horrid and he uses text speak almost exclusively, even though he's like 58. Sorry, but I still text with full words and to be honest, it's annoying me to the point I don't want to keep it up. Sigh -- come on, 'guy I like' (fingers crossed that it will continue to develop so I can get off this weird carnival ride called online dating)  :o
« Last Edit: August 04, 2016, 06:05:35 PM by arneal »
Andree'

Seek peace, and pursue it - Psalm 34:14b

Momtojandj

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #684 on: August 04, 2016, 11:29:18 PM »
So I joined a Facebook group, single in NJ. More for advice , and just to see what it is about than trying to find someone on there to date. Anyway .. One guy posted .. Don't you wish people would be brutally honest in their profile , and he proceeded to say what he would write. So I decided to say what I wish I could write on a profile.. Now before I tell you , or maybe it doesn't matter .. But how brutally honest can you be? Or should you be? Maybe if we all were more honest with our wants, needs and our faults , would that help or hurt us online? Hmm .........
"To love another person is to see the face of God "

SemperFidelis

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #685 on: August 05, 2016, 01:39:01 AM »
Momtojandj, it turns out you can be brutally honest and not scare away EVERYONE.

My match profile underwent about three revisions. One version of mine was....uhhh..... *way way way way* too much information. I was all cracked out making profiles within the first months of my husband's death. And I am thoroughly embarassed by this particular (2nd) version of my profile.
Well. My ch2..... He had messaged me once with my first profile, and I ignored him. On my third profile he messaged again months later. I did not realize he had also viewed my profile during the crazy 2nd profile time. Lol. I was so embarrassed to know he saw it. But it showed me something I appreciate about him, that he cannot be scared away....he cannot be shocked..... And he has patience and understanding for me in my craziest hour even at the very beginning.

So post away. Post some crazy sh*t and scare off the cowards.

Forgottenwife

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #686 on: August 05, 2016, 10:27:48 AM »
So post away. Post some crazy sh*t and scare off the cowards.

I posted a little crazy stuff too! It worked!! Being your genuine self is the best way to find someone who is right for you, but its ok to temper that with putting your best foot forward too. I met my Chapter 2 who I have been exclusive with now for more than three years on OKCupid. I thought OKCupid was good for many reasons: There was no limit to the number of people I could chat with, I could see where we had beliefs and attitudes in common, and I found the interface very easy. My partner is all that - funny, loving, interesting, passion for his work, reliable, kind and a great companion. Loves his Mom and all that. And he was just hanging out on OKCupid too! I had to put myself out there for rejection, weed through lots of weirdos, endure some unsolicited penis pictures, hear that I live too far or I was too fat or whatever. I also met lots of regular, successful men looking for a partner. I say take a chance and don't take the weirdos and the ghosters and insulting creeps too seriously.

SemperFidelis

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #687 on: August 05, 2016, 10:57:20 AM »
Forgotten wife, you nailed it with the attitude necessary for online dating. Cheers!

MrsDan

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #688 on: August 05, 2016, 11:10:29 AM »


 Loves his Mom and all that.

This cracked me up because one of my favorite pictures of my boyfriend on OKCupid was of him and his mom. I just thought it was so sweet. And they are close, although he is also good about boundaries too. Apparently, I owe a lot to his stepsister. She told it was time for him to get back online, and she encouraged him to use that picture. He was like, "Really?" And she was all, "oh yes, definitely."
You are the Bear of my heart dear,
And nothing can take that away.

SemperFidelis

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Re: On line dating vents and laughs......
« Reply #689 on: August 05, 2016, 12:01:09 PM »


 Loves his Mom and all that.

This cracked me up because one of my favorite pictures of my boyfriend on OKCupid was of him and his mom. I just thought it was so sweet. And they are close, although he is also good about boundaries too. Apparently, I owe a lot to his stepsister. She told it was time for him to get back online, and she encouraged him to use that picture. He was like, "Really?" And she was all, "oh yes, definitely."

Lol, that's outstanding :-)