Author Topic: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)  (Read 1670 times)


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  • chemie
Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« on: August 08, 2015, 04:56:09 AM »

Three years out now and I tried my first holiday alone this week, thanks to the encouragement of Grace. Packed my bags and headed off to a retreat in the far north of Scotland, just for three nights, pretty nervous.

I chose the place carefully, knowing that eating alone would be too difficult, this place everyone ate together at one big table. Mostly is was pretty great, I chatted to lots of lovely people from all over the world, including the Belgian Orienteering team and made friends with a wonderful German lady who ended up returning to Edinburgh to stay with me (just took her back to the airport).

During the day it was lovely to be able to do whatever I liked at my own place and each day I headed out with my bike and cycled. One day I cycled most of the day through forest and along a beach without seeing a soul! I survived getting lost three times (thank God for GPS) and was lucky not to get a puncture or fall off when so isolated.

I can see from this perspective now that there are advantages to being alone, making your own choices, going at your own pace and only having to please yourself, but oh my goodness the evenings were awful! Once we had all eaten at 6pm there was nothing to do, I was tired from cycling, everyone vanished and I found myself in bed by 8.30 once!

This was an experiment and I think it has given me the courage to try this again, but I need to be better planned and have some movies downloaded or something for the evenings as remote places in Scotland have no phone signal.


I had a fantastic few days
Cycled some gorgeous places
Ate with others
Reflexology and yoga
Met amazing people


Evenings were crap and lonely
Getting a little scared when I got lost

I am interested as to how others have coped holidaying alone and what do you do in the evening?


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2015, 05:40:20 AM »
Wow, it looks amazing and you are so brave! I have two young children so won't have the opportunity to travel alone but I hear what you're saying about evenings being tough - I feel like I cope ok during the day but the evenings do suck. I hope others may be able to offer some more constructive advice.


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2015, 08:07:49 AM »
What a beautiful place, Helen!  It can be difficult to be completely alone, though.  I'm glad you had successful bike rides, too!  Lots of time to think...

Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #3 on: August 08, 2015, 08:59:33 AM »
The pictures are beautiful! I think it's great you went alone but I can see how the evenings felt long and lonely. I have 3 kids so solo travel is not happening for me anytime soon. You are an inspiration!
You will forever be my always.


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #4 on: August 08, 2015, 06:04:53 PM »
I have only done a couple of short trips by myself.  The last one I went to visit a friend who had a stroke. She was still in the hospital and I spent the day with her but left around 5ish.  The evenings were boring.  I like to run but didn't feel safe running in a  area I know nothing about. I did pack a couple of books and had a tv in my room so that's basically what I did.  I was in bed early a couple of days.  Nights are lonely even when I'm at home. I should be used to it but I haven't managed that yet.
The landscape is fabulous. Love the pictures. 


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #5 on: August 08, 2015, 07:21:24 PM »
Looks so peaceful! I'm glad you enjoyed your holiday.

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." Dr. Seuss


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #6 on: August 09, 2015, 05:54:29 AM »
Don't want to sound patronising, but I am proud of you, Helen. You did it! All by yourself! Holidaying alone will never be perfect but, for me, neither was travelling with DW!

I'm sorry everyone was lame and in bed early :-( . A good test for you listening to the silence - an important part of accepting our widowhood - though not ideal.

Don't let that put you off future trips. I hope you still found it empowering and I know that there are many adventures out there just waiting for someone special like you to enjoy them.

Musings of this sarcastic but upbeat young widow can be read here :


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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #7 on: August 09, 2015, 06:23:46 AM »
It looks beautiful Helen.

I haven't traveled alone but traveling with one school aged child can have many similar qualities. It was daunting to take the first trip with DD alone. New places, having to navigate on my own, getting a bit lost hiking in the desert(very different environment than I'm used to). Yes I had company of my daughter but also tremendous responsibility for her welfare. 

In the end, each time we stretch ourselves and our comfort zones, we grow. Sounds like a great trip and so glad you're already thinking about what you'd do next time.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows ...
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i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #8 on: August 10, 2015, 08:52:54 AM »
it looks like beutiful place
loved the idea of riding your bike everywhere
soon after don died I rented a place on the beach in the winter 
 not sure if ts considered alone , I had my dog so lots of walks on the beach
I brought a jigsaw puzzle for the nights sounds kinda crazy but it did occupy my time
wasn't brave enough to eat out so brought take out back in

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Re: Holidaying alone (got my brave on)
« Reply #9 on: August 10, 2015, 10:50:50 AM »
Gorgeous!  So beautiful!  The landscape is such a balm, I find.

I went to Israel at 2 years out, on my own.  I visited with friends, but was alone several days and evenings.  I always got hotel rooms with balconies on either the sea or a busy street in an active part of a city, so I would have something to watch in the evenings if I wanted it.  One night, there was a jazz festival going on, and so I could hear so much great music just from my balcony and people watch and watch the city from above.  I brought a couple books.  I went to restaurants and bars (one drink only).  I wrote.  I took walks.  When I travel alone, though, I tend to go to bed a tad early and wake early. 
widowed 2011 (DH 28)