Author Topic: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this  (Read 9339 times)

Aspen530

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #45 on: September 10, 2015, 06:57:03 AM »
Does anyone have any advice on sleeping? I can't seem to get more than 5 or so hours.  Every morning I wake up with a start at around 430-530am. The really weird thing is i believe that he might have died between those hours. I feel like my body is torturing me and waking me up Every single day at these times because it's when he left me.  I realize that isn't very rational considering I really don't know when he died. (In his sleep) I'm just so sick of living this life especially with no sleep

TooSoon

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #46 on: September 10, 2015, 07:03:22 AM »
Hi Aspen,  I'm so sorry for your loss. 

Not wanting to take pharmaceuticals, I started taking 3 micrograms of melatonin a while ago.  Over the counter doses are 3 milligrams but a friend recommended the much lower dose of 3 micrograms and it works like a charm.  One melatonin and a page or two of a book and I am out.  Can be ordered on amazon or bought at a health food store.   Also a spoonful of really good honey alone or in a cup of warm tea before bed will enhance the melatonin and make it more effective. 

Sleep is a problem for a lot of us.  Wishing you rest. 

Wheelerswife

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  • Widowed x 2.
Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #47 on: September 10, 2015, 07:11:05 AM »
Sleep is a problem for a lot of us.  Wishing you rest. 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This.  I didn't get much more than 4 hours of sleep a night for quite awhile.  I took to staying up as late as I could because I hated being awake in the middle of the night.

Hugs...and I hope you get more sleep.

Maureen
Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

Empathy  Developer  Responsibility  Adaptability Connectedness

Michael797

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #48 on: September 10, 2015, 08:06:12 AM »
TooSoon is correct; I second the melatonin recommendation. My bottle was 5 mg caps, and I ended up taking two of them every night - pretty much knocked me out. I stopped taking them because of grogginess during the day (I'm a teacher and can't afford to be out of it in front of a class of hungry wolves). Your mileage is going to vary, so maybe ask the pharmacist - but damn near every place that sells vitamins has it. Read up a bit, though, please. You might want to consult a doctor as well - Ambien is often prescribed, but all it does is knock you out; when the pill wears off in four hours, you pop right back up. Not recommended for long-term use, either. Have a talk with a pharmacist you trust about melatonin. And keep posting - somebody here will have an answer to damn near any question you can ask.

TooSoon

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #49 on: September 10, 2015, 08:10:09 AM »
I have zero grogginess with the 3 micrograms.  It is a tiny amount but it does the trick for me.  The higher dose just wired me even more.  I've never taken Ambien but my parents do and they don't remember anything I've said after they've taken the pill...

Jess

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #50 on: September 10, 2015, 08:13:21 AM »
I got so little sleep in he beginning I actually experienced hallucinations. It wasn't like Charlie Chaplin suddenly as in the room doing a routine or something like that. It was more hearing noises that weren't there and seeing orbs of light the size of bugs whizzing towards my face. Crazy, right?

I started sleeping any chance I possibly could. 30 minutes here, an hour there. It wasn't until I was nearly 3 months in that I slept through the entire night. It helped me to put something on tv. My attention span was such crap I would be able to drift off. Often, it took 3 or 4 passes to watch an hour long show, but sleep was happening. I also completely gave up caffeine for about the first 2.5 months.

Not sleeping compounds everything and that sucks so much. At over a year out now, I do often sleep through the night, but I do not always. My wake ups are shorter and I can go back to sleep easier. I so hate saying it took months for me, but do remember everyone is different and it may straighten out sooner rather than later for you. I hope it does.
On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good. - Unknown

Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain by being joyous. - Hazrat Inayat Khan

Joe: 1979- 7/2014

Guaruj

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Re: 1 week in... I don't know how I will do this
« Reply #51 on: September 10, 2015, 05:56:45 PM »
Does anyone have any advice on sleeping? I can't seem to get more than 5 or so hours.

I only had problems with sleep during a brief period of intense rage. Otherwise, I seem to sleep OK.

All I can recommend is doing the things that keep your body on a regular cycle:
  • Make sure you eat well, and at regular mealtimes.
  • Get some exercise outside during daylight hours. Your dog would probably be glad to help you do this. ;)
  • Don't stay up too late. Consider going to bed early.
  • Don't drink too much alcohol. That is known to disrupt sleep.

Quote
Every morning I wake up with a start at around 430-530am.

That's not the worst time to wake up, though I wouldn't recommend any earlier. When I was first widowed, I set my alarm for 5:00 AM instead of 6:00. That way, I could visit my wife's grave for 10 or 15 minutes and still get to work early. Now that 14 months has passed, I still have my alarm set for 5:00, even if I don't go to Catherine's grave every day like I used to.

I hope you sleep much better tonight.

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