Author Topic: No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....  (Read 1299 times)

Anna from Belgium

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No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....
« on: September 24, 2015, 02:51:56 AM »
Dear all,

I've been coming to this forum from time to time now, reading messages, finding support in the shared experiences.

Today is the first day I will write a post myself, 5 months after the sudden death of my 36 years old husband, my first love ... my companion, the father of our two children .... Life is difficult (reading Dr. Scott Peck's book 'The Road Less Traveled' now, my husband's favorite book) and life is complex. My husband and I were connected through love, but pain was also an important part of our daily life. A chronic depression and difficult childhood made life a challenge for my husband ... I tried coping through a co-dependency mechanism. So much easier to discern these patterns now, now that everything has so abruptly stopped. Individual therapy, couples therapy ... we were trying so hard to be happier with the 4 of us ... accepting the end of these efforts is very difficult.

Today would have been our 10 year wedding anniversary ... so today is difficult ... more than I imagined ... the pain is hard, but I also feel that going through this pain and 'surviving' this day is a healing experience ... it's necessary ....

Thanks to all of you for sharing your experiences and for the anonymous support ... so valuable at this moment,

Take care,



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Re: No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....
« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2015, 03:54:40 AM »
« Last Edit: May 30, 2016, 09:28:47 PM by THATgurl »


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Re: No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....
« Reply #2 on: September 24, 2015, 07:08:58 AM »
thanks for posting this
this will be a hard day and I am glad you are letting us be a part of it
hopefully at some point today, through the sadness, maybe you can remember some of the good times you had
wedding anniversary's are tough as it was about just the two of you
take care

My everything


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Re: No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....
« Reply #3 on: September 25, 2015, 10:04:44 AM »
Sending you tight hugs, Anna. I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. Anniversaries feel so hard. I think it is because the only other person who shared the deep significance of the day is no longer here to share it with. Other important dates usually are shared and celebrated by others, but an anniversary is a couple's special day. I'm sorry you have reason to join this community, but hope you will find it a source of comfort.

More hugs...
Without you, Baby, I'm not me.


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Re: No 10 year wedding anniversary today ....
« Reply #4 on: September 26, 2015, 08:44:26 PM »
I can't add any wisdom, but I'm sending lots of hugs and support from here too. Wishing you peace tonight...
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton