Poll

Ladies, which would you rather hear when you think you might want to meet someone from online?

I'd really like to meet you sometime.
5 (15.2%)
I'd really like to meet you sometime. Here's my number if you'd like to call or text.
4 (12.1%)
I'd really like to meet you sometime. Would you like to exchange numbers?
22 (66.7%)
Other.
2 (6.1%)

Total Members Voted: 33


Author Topic: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.  (Read 8628 times)

imissdow

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Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #30 on: March 12, 2015, 07:43:48 PM »
I did online dating for about 16 months. Met about 10 guys for coffee/dinner/whatever.  I usually would e-mail them for at least a week. By that point I had a pretty good idea of if they were who they were claiming to be.  I did meet my share of scammers and married guys.  Most of these I figured out in that 1 week time.  If a guy asked me to meet early on I would typically reply that I would be happy to meet them for coffee after I got to know them a little better say in a week or so. That way a guy knew what time frame I was looking at.  I did have a couple of guys tell me that this was to long and I was wasting their time, most however were fine with this a we sent a few e-mails back and forth and then I would usually suggest meeting at a local coffee shop within a week or 2.   A few gave me their number I don't think I ever gave them mine to begin with. If I felt like it after meeting we would exchange numbers.  I think I only had 3 second dates and only 1 got a third. Most of the time I was really glad I had taken a little extra time at the beginning and not given out my phone number .

Vettie

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #31 on: March 12, 2015, 09:36:49 PM »
For me, if I was going to give out my number,  I would like to get to know someone before I meet them.  I would not want to text as alot can be lost through just typed words.   Also, I find texting annoying. I can say it quicker than I can type it.  So call and talk to me already, lol!
 
missed forever and always...

HvnBound

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  • Posts: 105
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #32 on: March 12, 2015, 10:10:47 PM »
After a few messages back and forth I would give them my Google Voice number so we could talk. If we became an item then I would simply say I changed my phone number and would give them my real phone number.
"It's time to start living the life you've imagined."

  --  Henry James

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order
to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you.
  -- Unknown

DonnaP

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  • Posts: 250
  • Forever changed because I loved you!
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #33 on: March 13, 2015, 07:56:50 AM »
What if you try something like this:


"I'm interested in getting to know you better. What setting would you feel most comfortable with? If I'm rushing things, please let me know. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable in any way."

I have almost no experience with the online dating thing either - so I am probably not the best person to ask. I am only going by what I'd like to hear if I were on the receiving end...

Good luck!
Donna
*******
I still think of you, Mick...every SINGLE day!

serpico

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  • Posts: 272
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #34 on: March 13, 2015, 08:18:33 AM »
Try this one..."Maybe we could get together and just eat a bunch of caramels."  If she doesn't know what you're talking about then it's probably best you avoid her anyway. :)
'I think I got some of your pickle'

DonnaP

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  • Posts: 250
  • Forever changed because I loved you!
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #35 on: March 13, 2015, 08:27:15 AM »
Try this one..."Maybe we could get together and just eat a bunch of caramels."  If she doesn't know what you're talking about then it's probably best you avoid her anyway. :)

And if she looks at you funny, just say: "Well, it's just as arbitrary as drinking coffee, if you think about it."

 ;)
*******
I still think of you, Mick...every SINGLE day!

Mel4072

  • Guest
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #36 on: March 13, 2015, 08:30:51 AM »
I prefer the "would you like to meet" before giving out numbers. I am very timid when it comes to online dating and dating in general. I had several guys tell me that I was weird bc I didn't want to exchange numbers. Their loss. Giving out my number gives out a lot of other info about me. Address and such. The www gives people access to a lot of personal info. I have a 16 yr old daughter to protect. And myself. More worried about the daughter though.
So, the one dude who said "ok, that's unusual but that's fine because I'd like to meet you." I called him and we talked for about an hour. Then I was sure that I wanted to meet him.

Carey

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  • Widowed 11/23/13 Joined YWBB 12/2/13
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #37 on: March 13, 2015, 08:36:02 AM »
One thing about myself that drives me crazy? I HATE, literally DESPISE talking on the phone.  I don't even really know why, Its funny because I met DH on the phone lol And I was in Texas and he was in NC and that was before cell phones and all that so we talked. And talked and talked. So much we ran up both phone bills so bad I just had to move back here. So I don't know why I don't like it now. I will say Im more receptive to talking on the phone after Ive met someone in person. But I really am starting to hate this stuff.
I can't look at the stars they make me wonder where you are. 
Stars.... up on heaven's boulevard
And if I know you at all
I know you've gone too far
 So I .... I can't look at the stars --Grace Potter

jeff1973

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  • Posts: 26
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #38 on: March 13, 2015, 10:17:24 AM »
I really think I would prefere to skip the dating game if it's just the same to the world..

I'm certain I would like to wake up one day and find that I am married to a beautiful,

confident, talented, loving, "normal", outgoing, schnauzer loveing, Lady!! :)

Wait a minute, I had that once,,, It was not a dream.. She is gone now..

But this NIGHTMARE continues,, It never seems to end....

Jeff1973           Typo
« Last Edit: March 13, 2015, 11:06:12 AM by jeff1973 »

DrBanner

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  • Posts: 7
  • "That's my secret, Cap. I'm always angry."
Re: Trying not to scare them off on the dating sites.
« Reply #39 on: March 18, 2015, 07:03:06 PM »
What if you try something like this:


"I'm interested in getting to know you better. What setting would you feel most comfortable with? If I'm rushing things, please let me know. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable in any way."

I have almost no experience with the online dating thing either - so I am probably not the best person to ask. I am only going by what I'd like to hear if I were on the receiving end...

Good luck!
Donna

That's good. Comfortable is the key.  :)