Author Topic: Human touch  (Read 3013 times)

hachi

  • Member
  • Posts: 229
  • Widowed 7-6-2012 YWBB Joined 6-10-2013 Loc:NH
Re: Human touch
« Reply #15 on: October 08, 2015, 09:53:59 AM »
Trying,

In thinking about this a little bit more, and reading some of the other responses, I think this is a really great idea. Like Calimom, I did cry through some of the first massage that I got after I became widowed. At the time, I figured, what the hell, I don't know this therapist. She's probably had someone cry before. But I think I would have been less self conscious if I new my practitioner was, as Maureen said "experienced in and sensitive to issues of chronic disability, oncology, grief and loss."

Oh, and if I was closer, I'd be all over the volunteer thing! I wish you the best with this...  :)
If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough.      ~ A. Einstein

Jen

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 1076
  • Jim: 7 April 1974-10 April 2014
Re: Human touch
« Reply #16 on: October 08, 2015, 11:55:27 AM »
I absolutely crave touch-- sometimes, almost unbearably so. That said, I haven't gotten a massage, or even a manicure, because I'm afraid of two things: one, I would break down right there in front of everybody (although massage therapists I've known say that happens fairly frequently, and it's not a big deal), and I would come to rely on it for a "fix." Better to learn to deal with the starvation, maybe? I don't know... I wish I could find some way to either remove the need or find someone to provide it consistently. Hugs from my kids and, occasionally, coworkers are great, but... :-\

I don't know if this helps at all, just my 2 cents. Hugs! (lol)
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton

Trying

  • Member
  • Posts: 1635
  • aka MissingmyTim
Re: Human touch
« Reply #17 on: October 08, 2015, 09:25:50 PM »
BH2, I don't know why someone would do that to you, of course you are saddened.

Emotional releases are very common with massage, it has happened to me and it's been just as helpful, to me, at certain times as my psychologist.

Jen, maybe start with just a manicure and work yourself up to a massage.  Cost is a deterrent for coming to rely on it for a fix I think.  I have been fortunate to have gotten several gift certificates for massage including one recently from the realtor who sold my house.  Now I get them at school!  The best part about giving a massage is that it becomes all about the person on the table and not about me.  Getting out of my own head is a beautiful thing.
You will forever be my always.

DansSoulmate

  • Member
  • Posts: 87
Re: Human touch
« Reply #18 on: October 14, 2015, 08:32:37 AM »
I think this is a wonderful idea and if you haven't treated yourself to some pampering you should put it on your list of things to do.  I was fortunate to receive gift cards that have helped defray the cost and in one case it was free because the student needed the hours.  Beyond touch though there is another helpful aspect for me and that's just warmth and the transfer of positive energy.  I remember early on sitting in a movie theater next to a big burly guy who was really warm (like a furnace) so I moved my arm closer to his to catch the warmth, lol.  But I think  massages, facials, pedicures, and manicures are just a start for taking care of yourself in this stressful time.  I think other tools such as meditation and aromatherapy, among others, can be useful too.
« Last Edit: October 14, 2015, 08:36:23 AM by DansSoulmate »

Alexsander

  • Member
  • Posts: 10
  • Widower since July 2013
Re: Human touch
« Reply #19 on: October 14, 2015, 09:25:15 AM »
Someone posted this link years ago when I was going thru this. It helped me a lot:
http://outlawblogspot.blogspot.com.br/2005/10/skin-hunger.html

BrokenHeart2

  • Member
  • Posts: 975
  • Widowed 2013
Re: Human touch
« Reply #20 on: October 15, 2015, 06:23:05 AM »
Wow A, thanks for posting that link. I sure can relate and it helps to know I'm not crazy ( once again ;)
I don't want it to be his legacy that his death destroyed me.
I need to honour his life by rebuilding my life.

Joey

  • Member
  • Posts: 15
Re: Human touch
« Reply #21 on: October 19, 2015, 01:09:42 AM »
..... Now I don't even like cyber hugs

Funny as hell!
"The winds of change may blow around you, but that will always be so
When love is pain it can devour you, you are never alone"
In The Light
Led Zeppelin