Author Topic: 3 years  (Read 1291 times)

Momtojandj

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  • Widowed since 10/2012 . Living in NJ
3 years
« on: October 20, 2015, 07:52:52 AM »
Wtf.. 3 years .. I look at pictures of the kids from then and now, he wouldn't recognize them. All that has changed , fixed, broken , purchased and yet the constant is he's not here . I've dated , was with someone for a year .. I can move on in a sense .. The kids ? Never will have another father, one that loved them , cherished them , was there for them . Wtf .. I can recall every part of that day three years ago , leading up to when the police were waiting for me when I got home from work.
"To love another person is to see the face of God "

Captains wife

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2015, 08:02:09 AM »
Sorry momtojandj,

I so understand what you are saying - I am 3 years and 5 months out, and also lost my husband suddenly in an accident. I see pics of the 3 of us and think to myself - what the hell happened to our lives? My 4 year old son was talking about his dad being dead the other day and its heartbreaking. He asked when he could see him. Its absolutely NOT fair that our kids have to be subjected to this and NO ONE will ever come close to being there and loving him like his Dad did. I too feel I am trying to move forward but the sense of loss for my son also breaks my heart and holds me back.

Sending widow support - so sorry we and our kids all have to go through this nightmare.....

 

Abitlost

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #2 on: October 20, 2015, 02:32:09 PM »
Wtf.. 3 years .. I look at pictures of the kids from then and now, he wouldn't recognize them. All that has changed , fixed, broken , purchased and yet the constant is he's not here . I've dated , was with someone for a year .. I can move on in a sense .. The kids ? Never will have another father, one that loved them , cherished them , was there for them . Wtf .. I can recall every part of that day three years ago , leading up to when the police were waiting for me when I got home from work.

I get it. Sometimes my life feels surreal.

Hugs,

abl

momtokam

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  • Widowed September 2012
Re: 3 years
« Reply #3 on: October 20, 2015, 08:16:07 PM »
Wtf.. 3 years .. I look at pictures of the kids from then and now, he wouldn't recognize them. All that has changed , fixed, broken , purchased and yet the constant is he's not here . I've dated , was with someone for a year .. I can move on in a sense .. The kids ? Never will have another father, one that loved them , cherished them , was there for them . Wtf .. I can recall every part of that day three years ago , leading up to when the police were waiting for me when I got home from work.

I so conpletely understand this, practically word for word except his boss showed up at my door...

Biggest hugs to you and your kids.

Jen

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #4 on: October 20, 2015, 09:19:19 PM »
So many hugs... I'm sorry that's all I've got right now...
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton

Trying

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #5 on: October 20, 2015, 09:26:21 PM »
We can plug through our days, and time passes, then something like a sadiversary or other trigger makes us stop and really look at all our spouse has missed, all that our kids have missed out on, all that we once had and it all seems too impossible.  Sending you big hugs.
You will forever be my always.

canadiangirl

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #6 on: October 27, 2015, 07:26:44 PM »
I hope you made it through the day okay.  I agree with Trying, sometimes out of the blue it hits you and seems impossible.  Thinking of you.

lcoxwell

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Re: 3 years
« Reply #7 on: October 27, 2015, 07:40:15 PM »
I am so sorry for all that you and your kids have lost out on. Time changes things, but it can never erase all that you shared, and it cannot erase all those moments that he should have been able to share with you, now and in the future. As others have said, it is all so very unfair. (((Hugs)))
"The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude." - Thornton Wilder

Thank you, my dearest Kenneth, for loving me and for giving me the best 13 years of my life.