Author Topic: 3 Years Ago Today...  (Read 2192 times)

SoVerySad

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3 Years Ago Today...
« on: March 21, 2016, 08:02:46 AM »
my best friend, soulmate, love of my life husband of 27 years died suddenly and unexpectedly. I still love and miss him deeply every day and mourn the fact that he isn't here to finish raising our children together. They are missing out on so much richness in their lives. Even after 3 years, I still feel married, still wear my wedding rings. It is hard to explain to others.

I was thinking this morning about how weird I thought he was when I first met him. No attraction at all. I remember him telling me one evening I was working a split shift that I was going out with him and his friends instead of going home. I distinctly remember saying, "I am not going anywhere with you." I was such a snot. I have no idea why, but he was persistent and kept asking me to go out with his friends and him on several other occasions. I finally agreed one evening hoping it would get him to stop asking me.

Instead, it was the beginning of the most amazing friendship that eventually led to an amazing romance and marriage. That guy who I wanted nothing to do with became the man it has been almost completely unbearable to be without for these past 3 years. I'm going to do my best today to focus on all the incredible times we spent together - how he made me laugh, made me think, helped me grow, was my constant supporter, and showed me deep and abiding love every day.
Without you, Baby, I'm not me.

BrokenHeart2

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2016, 08:14:49 AM »
Big hugs SVS.  I can completely relate to all of what you said.  Me too :(  Be gentle with yourself today!
I don't want it to be his legacy that his death destroyed me.
I need to honour his life by rebuilding my life.

Jess

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2016, 09:15:24 AM »
Giving you one of your many patented tight hugs you have offered me. May your day have as many smiles at warm memories you can muster. Thinking of you.
On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good. - Unknown

Don't be concerned about being disloyal to your pain by being joyous. - Hazrat Inayat Khan

Joe: 1979- 7/2014

MrsT85

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2016, 12:52:53 PM »
((HUGS)) to you SVS.  From the ways you've lovingly talked about him over the years, I know your T was an amazing man and I hope you and your children are able to reflect on him and his life today with just as many laughs as tears. 

You have been an amazing beacon of love and support for all of us here, and while I wish you didn't have to be here with us I'm so grateful for all of your advice and your empathy.  You have shown both incredible strength and gentleness.  I hope you don't mind me saying that I think your T would be proud.
Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face

Do You Realize??

01/12/1977-04/06/2013

TooSoon

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2016, 01:21:49 PM »
I, too, send the hugs.  Today and everyday.  Thank you for being you and for being my friend.  xoxox

quovadis

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2016, 02:22:30 PM »
Tight ((hugs)), to you, my friend. I wish you peace and comfort as your and your children remember T.

Amor

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2016, 02:44:27 PM »
I truly hope you can remember the great times without a lot of pain. I am so glad you got 27 years together!
Amor

Trying

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #7 on: March 21, 2016, 04:58:57 PM »
Tight hugs to you as you mark this passage of time without your best friend and love. It's not that we need an excuse like a significant date to remember them, because we do every day, but these dates can force us to dig a little deeper.  Each love story is unique and beautiful, thank you for sharing a little bit of yours.
You will forever be my always.

Mr C

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2016, 07:24:09 PM »
Love the story of your T's persistence. May this day be filled with such sweet memories of the great relationship you shared.

(((HUGS)))
Mrs.C, You have been my Sweetheart, Best Friend and Love since 1987. You will be my Wife forever and ever and ever. Love Always, Mr. C

widowat33

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2016, 10:24:33 PM »
Thinking of you and hoping you were able to reflect on all those special memories with happiness and not too much sadness. Hugs.

SoVerySad

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2016, 11:30:35 PM »
Thank you all so very much for your kind words, support, and hugs. It really has meant a lot to me today and reinforced I have more support than I realize, which I am grateful for. I made it thru the day fairly well, as did our children. I decided to finally take some "me" time to get my hair cut and colored. It was months overdue and I've been embarrassed to go out anywhere. I almost broke into tears as the stylist was rinsing the dye from my hair. She was stroking my hair and massaging my scalp. It brought back the memories of how T would do that when I was under stress or had a headache. I would place my head on his lap and he would massage my head out of the mess it was in. It is those little things that can still slay you when you realize how much you miss them. I was able to hold back the tears, thankfully. I didn't want the stylist to think she had hurt me in some way.

Thank you all again!!
Without you, Baby, I'm not me.

Torn

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #11 on: March 22, 2016, 03:51:54 AM »
SoVerySad,
  Like everyone here, my heart goes out to you as I reflect back on my wife & the little things that she and I did & experienced over 20+ years.
  At 4 in the morning,missing your spouse's simple presence in the room....
I apologize for seeing down, I just simply can relate..
  Positive thoughts for you,hold tight.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

Oscar Levant

donswife

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #12 on: March 22, 2016, 07:24:54 AM »
hugs to you and I am so glad you made it through the day
and you had some "me" time for your self
Holding back the tears while getting your hair cut , good for you , not an easy task
but I hope you gave yourself some time to let the tears flow when you needed to
Take care
My everything

Jen

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Re: 3 Years Ago Today...
« Reply #13 on: March 23, 2016, 11:21:26 AM »
So many hugs and so much love... I'm sorry I missed the actual day, but please know you're never far from my thoughts. (((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

"Dying is easy. Living is hard. ~George Washington, Hamilton