Author Topic: Weekend Woes  (Read 1133 times)

AubreeAnn

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Weekend Woes
« on: May 31, 2016, 10:49:48 PM »
Though my love and I weren't moved in with one another just yet, I spent my Thursday's-Sunday's with him 24/7. Now I feel so lost without that. During the week I have work to distract my day but when I don't have him for my leisure time, I don't know what to do. We would have date night and just spend quality time together. What did others do to cope with that new empty time? I don't know how to deal with that void of time.

sandrine2279

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Re: Weekend Woes
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2016, 02:50:31 AM »
I lived with my love so ... I try the week end to look  like every day . go and see him every day and try to work at my office every day...
don't know if it can help you.

hugs

Sandrine

Mizpah

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Re: Weekend Woes
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2016, 09:47:27 AM »
Weekends were the hardest for me, as I believe they were for many.  Lots of empty time that you used to so look forward to spending together. 

I think creating some weekend rituals probably helps.  I did.  Friday nights were really hard for me - we used to rush home in excitement.  So I never headed straight home from work.  We are Jewish, so I went to Friday night synagogue to say the mourner's prayer for him (even though I don't believe in Gd - but he did, so I did it to honor him).  It gave me that sense of somewhere to go, a ritual (sorry I keep using that word so much).  Saturday mornings, I went to the gym to a really hard class and worked out.  I'd try to spend as much time outside as possible - I'd either walk for hours (I lived in NYC at the time) or I'd go sit by the river or in the park, usually reading or writing.  Sometimes I'd meet a friend.  I'd visit his parents for a couple hours and have lunch or tea with them and be sad together.  On Sundays I'd go running and take long walks, get manicures, read, write, think, again: try to be outside in the sun a lot.  I'd try to make Sunday brunch plans with a friend, or I'd go to the movies alone or with a friend on Saturday evenings. 

The weekends are kind of microcosms of our life in grief at the beginning: we need to reenvision our life without DH/DW and we are not ready to.  We have time to fill and we don't know what to do with it.  We don't know what we WANT to do, we don't know what to do without them. 

I'm thinking of you (all) and sending tons of love and hope and solace.
widowed 2011 (DH 28)