Author Topic: Spouse died due to violence, any others?  (Read 1725 times)


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Spouse died due to violence, any others?
« on: July 10, 2016, 02:19:19 PM »
Hey everyone,

I'm still rather new here, but did want to post in this forum. To be honest I 'belong' here for two reasons, the first being that my husband was abusive at times (which was considered normal in our community, so I don't really feel the need to talk about it here at this point in time) and the second is that he died due to violence. My husband tried to do the right thing and got killed for it. I was wondering, are there others out here who went through something similar?

As your wife I was proud and honoured, as your widow I will be too.
You died the way you lived - trying to do what was right.


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Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2016, 05:09:00 PM »
Hi, Ruth,

I can't say that I can relate to losing my husbands to violence, but there have been people here in the past who lost a spouse to murder.  The two that I can think about are perhaps about 6 years out right now and I don't know if either of them checks in on this forum any more.  Still, I'm glad you spoke up about your specific circumstances,  a non-legal "marriage", abuse within a relationship, and death with violence, because some people may have experienced these circumstances and they may not feel comfortable speaking up first.  Your posts may have several people now realizing that they aren't the only ones who are trying to cope with the emotional ramifications of similar experiences. 

I'm glad you found us and that you feel comfortable posting about what is on your mind.

Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

Empathy  Developer  Responsibility  Adaptability Connectedness


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Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
« Reply #2 on: July 11, 2016, 01:37:27 AM »
Hi Ruth.
No I can't personally identify with it, but I am ve4y sorry for your loss.
My wife was running with her run club she was with for years.
She slipped running a country trail and landed on her head.
So while she died of head trauma, it was an accident and not violence.
I have a daughter named Boo, a dog called Stick, and a truck named Zane Grey. My neighbors think I am nuts when they hear me yell Boo and Stick get in Zane.
Best part is neighbors leave the crazy guy alone.....


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Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
« Reply #3 on: July 26, 2016, 02:29:37 PM »
Hi Ruth. My husband died of suicide. Not violence.

But he was mentally ill (severe ptsd from combat)  and was VERY violent for the first few years of our marriage. I did believe he would end up killing me. However, this issue was eradicated with the introduction of medication for his ptsd.....So was not an issue for the final two years of his life.

It is very surreal to look back on....I know I have looked at it with new eyes now.


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Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
« Reply #4 on: January 26, 2018, 10:09:51 PM »
Hi Ruth,

It's been some time since you posted this so I'm not sure you will see this reply but my husband also died to violence. He had an addiction and one of his "connects" set him up and shot him as he was leaving 💔 I hope you have been able to get through each day with the love and support you need. I don't know your husband's circumstances but any violent death is a very personal, emotionally exhausting thing to go through (in my opinion), to say the least. I send you lots of love and healing energy, I'm so sorry you also know how it feels to go through this. Peace be with you ❤