Author Topic: It pisses me off...  (Read 1713 times)

piecesofapart

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It pisses me off...
« on: September 14, 2016, 08:30:31 PM »
Suicide Prevention week...it pisses me off...also the light a candle on Sept. 10th at 8 p.m. and the out of darkness walk...how the "f" does this really help bring "light" to suicide prevention?
The walk is done at night...the candle is done at night... to me it seems like it's still a shameful thing- in the dark...

A few of my friends posted about this last week...I wanted to yell...you have NO F-ing clue...

Well I bet most of our loved ones did not die at night...mine went at 11 a.m.

Just had to get this off my chest...having a hard week- due to "Suicide Prevention week..." just bringing up all the things I thought I had organized in my mind...

alice

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2016, 10:44:52 PM »
Piecesofapart, I'm sorry you're having such a tough time this week. Although I'm sure that the people who post about "suicide prevention" on Facebook are well-meaning, it's definitely dredged up feelings of guilt that I somehow missed a sign or that there was something I could have done to "prevent" my husband's suicide. Nearly 6 months later, I am at a point where I can accept that it was his choice and his choice alone, but reminders like this week aren't helpful for me either. Perhaps for people participating in walks and vigils it is a search for answers in a situation with so many unanswered questions. Peace and love to you and the community of suicide survivors who can find solace with this incredible group of people on this forum. 

Sugarbell

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2016, 07:25:48 AM »
I get it...I am so sorry.

We've walked in the walk since 2009...it's a tiny community walk. I've tried to rename our team and not go...but 2 of DHs friends loyally walk every year and raise a ton of money. One of them-his Dad died by suicide when he was in high school and he never discussed it until DH died. These are the two friends who have been there for my kids..and really I walk (not plan the walk just participate) every year for them.

My kids went when they were tiny. My boys no longer go...They say the whole thing is "dumb". And I see their point. Just my youngest daughter goes.

Over the years...I am not a suicide prevention person. I have always advocated for the survivors who are left in the dust. More money/resources need to be poured into support groups for them...because we can feel very isolated. But it seems the push is prevention (which I think more prevention efforts are bullshit except with teens/bullying but that's it).

Every disease has a day or week anymore. Just remember it's over soon...I usually hide the over zealous advocates so I don't have to see the whole candle/remember/phone a friend jargon.

My DH died between 6-8 in the evening. So yea the whole darkness thing makes no sense. ((((hugs)))
B.W.H. 9/24/2007

Forgottenwife

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2016, 09:32:56 AM »
Just had to get this off my chest...having a hard week- due to "Suicide Prevention week..." just bringing up all the things I thought I had organized in my mind...

I'm with you. It sucks.

SemperFidelis

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #4 on: September 16, 2016, 12:02:13 AM »
Yeah. I wouldn't have had any clue it was going on except I went to a veteran caregiver support group....and the host of it brought up suicide prevention week or month or whatever the hell it is.  I was quick to raise the bullshit flag.  She was basically saying "get rid of your guns to prevent veteran suicide". What horse manure. My veteran didnt choose one of our many guns to commit suicide. He was a goddamned Marine, he would have done it with a toothpick if he had to.

I just hate the idea of blame being laid on a SOS. What if one of the caregivers in the group has their veteran die of suicide? Will she be left feeling like she should have or could have prevented it? Gawd.

It's sick shit...these false senses of security people seek.

bumbleb

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #5 on: September 18, 2016, 11:21:34 AM »
Yes! Gawds, the flippin' posts from FB friends/acquaintances about how easy it is to prevent suicide- post a meme- light a candle-say a prayer- that'll stop the loved one who's focused on completing suicide.
If it was that easy to prevent, I would've lit a million candles to stop my husband from jumping off of a building nearly 7 years ago (D-day @the end of Oct.)
So, yes, this FB crap gets to me.
And I'm with Sugarbell, we need more advocates for the survivors.
Thanks for posting your thoughts piecesofapart- I needed to vent to people who get it.
This life after your death is a strange journey. M 1973-2009

piecesofapart

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Re: It pisses me off...
« Reply #6 on: September 26, 2016, 07:52:48 PM »
Thanks everyone...it means a lot to know you all understand....