Author Topic: 18 & a "widow" of two months  (Read 1149 times)


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18 & a "widow" of two months
« on: February 11, 2017, 09:12:11 PM »
Hi there,

I'm an 18 year old female. My boyfriend, 20, on and off for the past 6 years was in a car accident in December. He almost died the night of the accident, I just learned from his mom last night, but he then was rushed to hospital and was in a coma for two weeks. Then he had a stroke and was taken off life support.

We were never married. We started looking at engagement rings when I was 17, but I told him that we didn't have to rush since he didn't have much money. I knew we'd spend our lives together. We had it planned right down to the age we'd have our kids and the names of them since I was 13. He was my best friend, really, my only friend, and the most important person in the world to me. I can't imagine living without him, and that might sound dumb because I'm so young but still.

Right now I'm in between the month-anniversaries of the accident and his passing. And all my friends really have disappeared - I think, firstly, they can't relate to how close we are/were. Then they can't relate to a sudden, tragic death like this. I feel so empty.


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Re: 18 & a "widow" of two months
« Reply #1 on: February 12, 2017, 07:55:20 AM »
I can't imagine living without him, and that might sound dumb because I'm so young but still.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your boyfriend and that you had to find us.

No that doesn't sound dumb.   Right now you can't imagine living without him.  And there is nothing wrong with that.   Your loss is so new, and there is nothing wrong with not being able to look to the future. 



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Re: 18 & a "widow" of two months
« Reply #2 on: February 12, 2017, 08:12:05 AM »
Hello, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Married or not, you obviously had a connection with him and that is the important thing. This is so overwhelming, all feelings are 'allowed' . You will find your way and can. Don't give up. This is a good place, you will always find someone who has a minute and a soothing word and that is what we all need. It is easier to know you are not completely alone in this and there are people who can relate and understand. This website has saved me in so many desperate moments, there are some great people here you will see.
look after yourself, people will tell you all sorts of things and many may be hurtful, they do that because they are overwhelmed with imagining the unimaginable.
hugs to you
Por que tu fuego a?n me quema, sin ti las noches son eternas,
tu aroma sigue aqu?, no me deja ir.. Por m?s que intente y quiera olvidarte, yo nunca lograre dejarte, cautivo de este amor sincero esclavo de tu voz.. Por que estoy am?ndote, so??ndose, aunque no est?s aqu?..
Y yo te esperare, amor aunque los a?os lleguen sin querer (Marc Anthony)


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Re: 18 & a "widow" of two months
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2017, 11:06:17 PM »
I am sorry you are here and that your relationship was cut so short. You are allowed to grieve and it makes no difference you were not married - your were committed to one another. Though I knew my husband since the 7th grade, we started dating at 18. Sometimes you just know. Be kind to yourself and know that we understand your feelings...hugs for you.


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Re: 18 & a "widow" of two months
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2017, 10:31:50 AM »
So so sorry. WHat the others said is true. ABSOLUTELY doesn't sound dumb at all. What you are feeling,  unfortunately,  is utterly normal. WArm hugs
"Until my last breath, I loved you more than life itself." ~Kirk, in his envelope to be opened only upon his death.  And now I to you, My Love, until my last breath...


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Re: 18 & a "widow" of two months
« Reply #5 on: February 14, 2017, 03:41:49 PM »
So sorry for your loss. The things you are feeling are absolutely normal as we all have gone thru it. Eat and drink lots of water to keep yourself going. Yes friends will disappear as we all have seen it. Keep posting as it will help and also read other topics as it helps you to relate everything to yourself.