Author Topic: Dating while grieving - how soon is too soon?  (Read 1216 times)

jgib

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Re: Dating while grieving - how soon is too soon?
« Reply #15 on: May 03, 2017, 01:02:53 PM »
You are a thoughtful, smart woman.  It is not an easy road we all travel here. 

arneal

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Re: Dating while grieving - how soon is too soon?
« Reply #16 on: May 07, 2017, 11:45:29 AM »
Mishka -- sorry for your loss; know that you have come to a very special place. I am grateful for it and encourage you to participate as feel led.

As others have said, it is a very personal decision, when to date or become involved. I would caution however, that there is no other experience like being widowed. There is no telling when feelings of loss will hit you. You might find yourself in a vulnerable place at unexpected moments. It is important that YOU take care of you and your children.

That said, I was widowed for the second time 2/1 of last year. I started checking out online dating sites probably in April and met the person I am still dating at the end of May. My LH (late husband) had told me before he died that he did not want me to be alone for the rest of my life; at the time, I was angry at him for suggesting that he wouldn't be here with me, but there it is. I realized quickly that I too did not want to be alone. Having been widowed once already, I knew myself in that space. I have a small family (LH has a larger family) and tend to live a very private existence. I told my closest friends (like two or three people) and my mother that I was dating; they were happy for me. There are some in my family and LH's family who don't know that I am doing so because as you will see if you dig around here on the site, people have all sorts of ideas about when and how and who we should date and so forth. There can be judgment and if you aren't ready, well, let's just say the conversations with those friends and relatives may not go so well. There's also the possibility of being taken advantage of. It is important to be very careful.

Eyes open, love. And know you have friends here. (((hugs)))
Andree'

Seek peace, and pursue it - Psalm 34:14b