Author Topic: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?  (Read 294 times)

CandiceS

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Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« on: May 11, 2017, 07:24:31 PM »
Considering the mess that we've had to deal with since my boyfriends death, and the fact that I'm my kids only parent now, I've been thinking about starting a will. I haven't before because I didn't think it would be necessary since the kids had their father and I don't have a lot of possessions. I'm also considering pre paying for my funeral because I don't plan to purchase life insurance(the agency did everything they could to keep us from using his policy for the funeral, insisting keeping it with them to earn interest and finding the money elsewhere was a better idea), but I don't know if I'm going to be living here the rest of my life. Has anyone made an official will? What do you really have to do?
Never make important plans too far in the future. You never know what might happen.

BrokenHeart2

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  • Widowed 2013
Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2017, 07:50:56 PM »
DH insisted that we have wills made up 5 months before he died. I didn't want to but he pushed and I went along for him.  In hindsight, God love him for making all of this just a tad easier.  You could hand write and have 2 witnesses.... Um I think.
I don't want it to be his legacy that his death destroyed me.
I need to honour his life by rebuilding my life.

Julester3

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Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2017, 11:11:18 PM »
For a will, check your local laws. Some places just need witnesses to make it legal. Some places need a notary to certify it.

I did not do a will but I set up an estate trust for my children so they can inherit all our various assets and take less of a hit on taxes and such. I have added instructions for disbursements of some personal items. We had investments and I added the life insurance to our investment portfolio because the kids are getting SSI benefits. I think it's a good idea also to make sure you appoint an executor of your will, someone who can take custody of the kids if they are still minors, and appoint someone to be your health power of attorney to make your health decisions if you are impaired.

Mrskro

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Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2017, 06:01:48 AM »
Candice;

A will is about more than just possessions, there are other factors to consider.

When my FIL passed away in 2012, without a will because everything was jointly owned with my MIL, she just left everything the way it was, names on bills etc.   When MIL passes away, my husband was her executor and we had so much trouble trying to cancel the Hydro bill from her house.

Him to Hydro "we've sold the house, please cancel the service"
Hydro "your name isn't on the bill"
DH "No, that gentlemen passed away"
Hydro " are you his executor"
DH " no, he didn't have an executor here is his death certificate"
Hydro "who's been paying the bill for a year"
DH " his late wife, who has also passed away, here is her death certificate and will"
Hydro " she isn't listed on the bill either, we can't help you"

Fast forward 8 months, DH passes away with no will and I'm still receiving bills in the name of "The estate of...." 3 deaths later and can't get them to stop.   I called and got the same run around, at which point, I'm seriously annoyed, so I started sending the bills back "deceased"

It actually went to collections (and was dismissed easily once I told them the story but still a hassle I didn't need) because no one was named to deal with FIL's bills.

Everyone else has pretty much covered what I think you need, guardian, power of attorney, medical power of attorney (not the same person as power of attorney so your money and health are separate). 

This stuff all sucks but is necessary.

BrokenHeart2

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Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2017, 06:17:50 AM »
If you have any bills left Mrskro just call your MPP's office and tell them about the hassle.  They should be able to help you!
« Last Edit: May 12, 2017, 07:32:25 AM by BrokenHeart2 »
I don't want it to be his legacy that his death destroyed me.
I need to honour his life by rebuilding my life.

Trying

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  • aka MissingmyTim
Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2017, 07:24:52 AM »
I would immediately set in place custody for children, an executor and who you want to be your health proxy.  I think this is a gift we can give to those we leave behind so in they are not left with logistical nightmares on top of grief.
You will forever be my always.

serpico

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Re: Has your loss prompted any of you to start a will?
« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2017, 08:07:44 AM »
I'm also considering pre paying for my funeral because I don't plan to purchase life insurance(the agency did everything they could to keep us from using his policy for the funeral, insisting keeping it with them to earn interest and finding the money elsewhere was a better idea), but I don't know if I'm going to be living here the rest of my life.

You may want to consider life insurance again.  For someone as young as you appear to be, and if you are looking to get enough just to pay for your final expenses, it will be ridiculously cheap.  The agent has absolutely no say in how the money is used.

I guess I just see pre-paying for a funeral when you are young to be tying up your money unnecessarily for a (hopefully) long time.
'I think I got some of your pickle'