Author Topic: 8 years  (Read 576 times)


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8 years
« on: September 22, 2017, 05:51:10 AM »
I'm lying in bed in a hotel room not far from the home I shared with my first husband. 8 years ago at this hour, he was still conscious, but confused. In a couple of hours, he would slip into his final nap and a few hours later, he would take his last breath. I can still remember that day clearly.  It seems this happens every year, except I don't relive the entire last 16 months of his life again-or even the last week as much as I used to.

This year, I am closer to our old home and I came back here again to visit his grave and his mother and to see some old friends from our life together and some of the wonderful people who have supported me on my widow road.

Yesterday, I stopped by at the location of a special accessible playground that my husband and I had the privilege of helping create back in the mid 1990's. It was built in memory of a little boy who died at the age of 9 months from the same genetic disease that my husband managed to live with for 53 years. The playground had deteriorated over the years and had to be torn down. It is in the process of being rebuilt and is almost ready for its grand re-opening in a few weeks. When I stopped by, the mother of that little boy was there, and we had the unexpected opportunity to share hugs and some tears. Her young adult daughter was there, too. She was 9 months old at the first grand opening. We also talked of some of the children my husband and I had mentored in a scouting type group we led called Winners on Wheels. One is now a lawyer. Another is a graphic artist and I will get to see her tomorrow.

It is such a mix of sadness, grief, reminiscing, and life moving forward.

Grief really has its grip on me this week.

Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

Empathy  Developer  Responsibility  Adaptability Connectedness


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Re: 8 years
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2017, 07:07:28 AM »
What a beautiful way to honor his memory, visiting a place where his life had such an impact on others.  Hugs to you.
You will forever be my always.


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Re: 8 years
« Reply #2 on: September 23, 2017, 08:57:15 AM »
The park sounds wonderful. I am happy that you have good memories to sustain you. Words suck. How about a hug?


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Re: 8 years
« Reply #3 on: September 23, 2017, 02:28:32 PM »

Last month it was 8 years for me as well. How could so much time have passed? I hope your sad memories that have arisen this week are soon replaced with many more that are much happier ones.

--- WifeLess
« Last Edit: September 23, 2017, 03:59:34 PM by WifeLess »


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Re: 8 years
« Reply #4 on: October 29, 2017, 11:57:38 PM »
Hi Maureen - I remember you from the old board. I passed 8 years in August. I'm sorry the grief monster is hitting you so hard right now.