Author Topic: This really happened.  (Read 822 times)

boyo1991

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This really happened.
« on: September 30, 2017, 09:00:31 AM »
Hello everyone.

Me and my wife are very young. I am 25 years old. Now I understand people have become a widow at that age, but I have come to the conclusion that I am not a widow because she is always here with me.

In any case, please understand that I am still in an incredible emotional roller coaster as my wife is donating her organs today. I say it this way, because while her heart is still pumping technically she is only there for the donations. That's what is keeping her heart going, she knows what she wanted.

Today is also the one week anniversary of our marriage. That's right, not only am I young, and a male widow, but our future together had been cut extremely short. We agreed we were soulmates and I will never remarry.

When I came to terms this really was going to happen (and due to a lack of sleep this awful week) I wanted to find someone who may actually understand. Friends and family say they understand... But then they follow up with they can't even imagine what I'm going through... And I just knew there had to be someone out there that had a similar situation..

I remain firm that she resigned herself to this fate after she said she had lived more in our short time together than she ever had in her entire life...

I hope immensely there is someone else out there that's had a similar situation... I've read about how the Young widows club being obviously the club nobody wants to be in.. but from everything I've seen is that the very few I've found at the age of 25, they had been married for at the very least I had found was 10 months into marriage.... Don't get me wrong, obviously that's early, I just feel at a total loss of what to go to where because of my situation being so imminent... I'm not over the greeting process, but I know I never will...

Right now I just want to find comfort in being totally unique in such a bad way.... Male widow, at 25 years old and she died a week after getting married immediately after the honeymoon...

Thanks

sojourner

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #1 on: September 30, 2017, 04:57:22 PM »
I'm so sorry, boyo. Peace to you in this terrible time and always.

Tsnre

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2017, 11:10:33 PM »
I'm sorry you had to join the group. Were you together long before you were married? I am new to this group as well..age 33. It's definately a roller coaster. One day at a time

MR

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #3 on: October 02, 2017, 09:56:10 AM »
boyo1991,
So sorry to see you in this forum. Life is roll coaster and will be like this for a while. I am one year out but life is still same except pain is less and brain is able to think about some other stuff.
Peace

beth_krkswidow

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #4 on: October 18, 2017, 01:12:03 PM »
No words. I'm just so sorry you have joinef us
"Until my last breath, I loved you more than life itself." ~Kirk, in his envelope to be opened only upon his death.  And now I to you, My Love, until my last breath...

jeudi

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #5 on: October 18, 2017, 04:56:37 PM »
boyo-

Sorry you have the reason to be here. Everyone has different circumstances for sure but there is a lot of commonality to the experience and I am glad you found this community. It can surely help you navigate as you come here to vent, share and both fall apart and put yourself back together again.

As time moves along, don't forget about this place. It can really be a comfort.

Jdubb

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Re: This really happened.
« Reply #6 on: December 09, 2017, 02:23:24 AM »
Sorry to hear this.  Im 37,  my wife was 40. I had to make the decision to switch from lifesaving mode to comfort care,  switching off defibrillator in her pacemaker because there was no chance of recovery.  She passed away later that day.

Its probably easier for me because it was expected for a long time.  She was in pain alot.  Now we are both at peace.