Time Frame > Beyond Active Grieving

I Don't Miss Him, I Miss Us

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Yes, so much.  I do still miss him and again I miss US!! I miss the connection we had, knowing each other and being there for each other on so many levels to describe and I bet  you all get it!

Yes I miss us ..so much
The private jokes , the same sense pf humor
and just the fact that someone had your back no matter what
I could go on and on 
Thank for starting this post

Sometimes what I miss most was the ease. He felt like a second skin, and now (four years later!) I feel so exposed.

"I feel so exposed"

I truly feel this!  I have never been able to yet again find that elusive feeling of 'home' that I once had.  I never took him for granted, but I also never knew how much of 'Me' derived from the 'Us' that we had spent our whole life building.  But it makes sense really.  The 'Us' we all miss is so full & intricate and intertwined into every fiber of our being.  How could we not miss the whole package? 

I can still have happy times of course, but I've never been able to have that feeling of ease and comfort in my soul that came from being loved and someone's partner!

My whole adult life was wrapped up in my relationship with my husband.  I haven't missed him - brain cancer will do that to a relationship - but I also haven't found the same kind of terra firma and security I knew in my old life.  I don't think I'll ever believe in the kind of stability I had with Scott again.  It just doesn't seem possible to me. 


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