Author Topic: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant  (Read 353 times)

Lindsay

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35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« on: April 08, 2018, 02:56:44 PM »
2 weeks ago my worst nightmare came true.  My husband of 14years died suddenly of a heart attack on a work trip in his hotel room.  Hes left behind a 2 year old son, me and a little girl who is due in 5 weeks that will never meet her daddy. The pain is so severe I don't think ill ever see the light. Everyday I feel like I'm reliving the day I found out.  I still convince myself hes gone on work then it hits me like a ton of bricks that I'm never going to see  my husband again, my kids no longer have a dad, I'm no longer married, theres no longer mommy and daddy.  I didn't ask for this, we had an amazing marriage.  It was ripped out from underneath me. I don't know where to turn.

Portside

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #1 on: April 08, 2018, 03:09:03 PM »
Hey Lindsay - my deepest sympathies on the loss of your husband.

I'm sure it feels crushing right now but, as best you can, try to make it through the day. Then tomorrow, do it again - and again.

Do the things you must do and ignore the other tasks. Accept any offered help and try to reestablish your normal daily routine if you can: get up, shower, eat, care for your son, care for yourself. Don't be shy if you need to ask for help for when the baby comes.

Reach out here anytime. Many of us may have some positive help or advice to offer.


Mike

The one who blesses others is abundantly blessed; those who help others are helped. (Proverbs 11:25)

Peony

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #2 on: April 08, 2018, 05:12:12 PM »
Hi Lindsay,

I know that saying sorry is so completely inadequate, but I am so very sorry!  I wish I could give you a real hug.  I was 37 when my DH died suddenly and I was left with 3 young children to raise so I completely relate to that part.  However, I cannot even fathom how difficult it would be with a 2 year old and a baby on the way.  As Portside said, just make it through today.  Then tomorrow do it again.  Don't look too far ahead right now.  You will find that sometimes it's really even just about getting from minute to minute.  Keep posting if you can.  Even in the darkest hours, there is always someone here that will listen and be able to understand.

Peace, hugs & my deepest sympathy!

Julester3

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #3 on: April 08, 2018, 06:40:00 PM »
I am so sorry this has happened! I understand the crazy heart attack as that's what my husband passed away from but not on a work trip (he was consultant so it could have been) but at his tennis club after a rigorous 2 hour drill.

The shock, the hurt and the piercing pain will be hard but you have little ones to think of. Just make small daily goals, know that your two will need you and won't understand everything that's going on. You don't need to worry about that now. That's for a time much later when they are older. Take any help that is offered and it's okay to lean on others. You are still processing so be kind to yourself and get what rest you can. Does it suck? Absolutely. Can you survive this? Yes you can and you never have to like it but you can. Hugs!

MR

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2018, 01:51:07 PM »
Hi Lindsay,
So sorry for what happened. Please take care of yourself, your son and daughter to be born. Take one day at a time or even one hour at a time. Take help from others and don't stress yourself.
Hugs
Manoj

nat

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2018, 10:30:26 PM »
i am so so sorry to hear that. it is a tragedy.  i dont know what to say other than thay i lost my beloved husband 3 weeks ago too. he died slowly during 4 months and suffered in vegetable mode dying quickly seems to me now a "blessing" . you are so young though. i want the best for u and your kids.
wshing u also a easy birth
sinding u love from israel

Ursula

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Re: 35 widowed and 8 months pregnant
« Reply #6 on: April 15, 2018, 09:09:20 PM »
Dear Lindsay, I am so very sorry to hear of your tragedy. As everybody above said, take it bit by bit, moment by moment, give yourself time. There are no answers to the forever 'why me, us, now' questions that are screaming in your head. I lost my husband over 4 years ago and it does get easier. I never believed that when I was at this early ,your, stage, but it does happen and even if this is no consolation to you now, you can and will get there, one day at the time, in your own time.
This place has saved me from going insane and there are some wonderful people here. Try and come here often, it makes one feel less alone with this trauma and people have helped me so many times through so many sleepless nights.
All my warmest wishes to you from afar with getting through to see the ilght again and good luck with the rpegnancy and all that comes after.
Por que tu fuego a?n me quema, sin ti las noches son eternas,
tu aroma sigue aqu?, no me deja ir.. Por m?s que intente y quiera olvidarte, yo nunca lograre dejarte, cautivo de este amor sincero esclavo de tu voz.. Por que estoy am?ndote, so??ndose, aunque no est?s aqu?..
Y yo te esperare, amor aunque los a?os lleguen sin querer (Marc Anthony)