Author Topic: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?  (Read 2616 times)


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Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« on: April 01, 2015, 01:59:54 PM »
I recently stumbled upon this book, which was written by a longtime funeral director and embalmer. It's not going to be for everyone, but for some reason since my wife was killed I have more of an interest - call it morbid curiousity, if you'd like - about the deathcare business.  And wow, did this book appeal to that curiousity.  I wouldn't call it macabre, but it doesn't spare too many details, and of most interest to me was its lengthy discussion of the business end of things. I highly recommend it if you have any interest in this sort of thing.
'I think I got some of your pickle'


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #1 on: April 01, 2015, 08:26:57 PM »
My High School best friend's family had/has a funeral home. I use to help out with the driving and such and we'd play cards in the back room with all of the guests of honor in attendance. You'd better keep a great sense of humor going or that type of work will grind you down. It is interesting to see it all from the 'back of the house'.

I do have a question though that I never have received a proper answer for:

When I picked Tam's ashes, the container was full to the brim. Which got me thinking: What are the odds that her cremains were exactly the amount needed to fill that container perfectly? Or, were there not quite enough and it needed to be added to to 'top it off'? Or, was there too much and the extra went . . .  where?

I guess it doesn't bother me what the truth was but I did wonder about it.

The war is over for me now. But those of us who did make it have an obligation to build again, to teach to others what we know, and to try with what's left of our lives to find a goodness and a meaning to this life.


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2015, 09:21:44 AM »
This site may answer the questions you have about the cremation process - it states "with the exclusion of minuscule and microscopic particles, which are impossible to remove from the cremation chamber and processing machine, all of the cremated remains are returned to the family":

I was actually surprised at how much I received but some of his ashes have already been spread on our property and now he's going to start travelling with me to places on his bucket list.  With the help of his best friend, in May he will be on his motorcycle riding through "Tail of the Dragon" in North Carolina. :)


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2015, 09:38:50 AM »
Chad took up 3 boxes lol. He was a big guy.  I wondered a lot of the same things though.  We ended up burying the contents of one box at his plot at the Veterans cemetery..had to in order to have a stone and I felt he was entitled to that. The 2nd box, we all gathered at the pier on the Cape Fear River at our camping spot and I put the contents of bag #2 in his favorite ball cap and we passed it around and everyone scattered a handful into the river.  #3 is still a mystery. Right now it's in a plastic bag tucked into the zipper case with his Flag from his funeral. IDK what to do with that, if anything. My kids (and honestly, me either) didn't want to part with ALL of them.  Which seems weird but not ....
I can't look at the stars they make me wonder where you are. 
Stars.... up on heaven's boulevard
And if I know you at all
I know you've gone too far
 So I .... I can't look at the stars --Grace Potter


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #4 on: April 08, 2015, 12:56:42 PM »
It made me a bit sad in the knowledge the funeral director was the last to see him naked. I never got to see him after he had died, I was only able to hold his hands through the sheet they had swaddled him in at the funeral home. I felt like I should have been the one swaddling him in that sheet.. It was his last intimate moment and it was with a stranger.

Stupid I know because it's not really him.

Also, do you think they check them out? Not in a sexual way obviously but in a ooo he would have been a good looking fella, hmmm that one coulda lost more weight! I'm sure they probably do make light of it, how else would they get through such a morbid job. Some things probably just shouldn't be thought about ha...


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #5 on: April 08, 2015, 01:09:56 PM »
I have a friend who does pick ups and embalming and another who upis a funeral director.  They are both professional and caring. My friend embalmed both his grandmothers. I cant say it is  just clinical because he really cared. They handled the drop off and pick up for cremation and the funeral and burial of the cremains. I trust them both very much and would feel safe having them handle me. Im the most modest personIi know.
"All the waves must reach the shore before the water calms"-Ray ♡


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2015, 04:41:14 PM »
My funeral director is a friend. No problem with her seeing Joe naked, or me either, whenever that happens. She was professional and caring - and a lovely woman. And thank G-d for that - it made things a little easier, I have to say.


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Re: Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2015, 06:50:52 PM »
My experience sounds a lot like marjoe. We grew up in the same small town with the funeral director and I never really thought too much about the process. All the family was pleased with his work and since he's the coroner, he was with DW practically every minute up to the cemetery trip.
~ she's gone to Heaven so I've got to be good, so I can see my baby when I leave this world ~