Author Topic: introduce yourself here  (Read 69865 times)

wecouldbeheros

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #300 on: December 30, 2016, 04:34:25 PM »
You all seem pretty nice, hoping to find some new friends.
: ))))

Wheelerswife

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #301 on: December 30, 2016, 05:39:55 PM »
Welcome Scott!

Thanks for joining in and giving your perspective.

Maureen
Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

Empathy  Developer  Responsibility  Adaptability Connectedness

MACC

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #302 on: December 31, 2016, 09:25:51 AM »
Hi I'm Macc. My husband died suddenly in April 2014 at the age of 41. He had a tear in the basilar artery (at the time we were unaware of)that caused him to have a brain aneurysm and stroke. Within a weeks time I had to make the hardest decision of my life and then tell our kids who were 4 and 6 that their dad died. I joined Widda in October 2015 and have been an occasional visitor and silent observer. I am so grateful for those that share. Recently I have become a frequent visitor and have taken the plunge and started sharing and participating. I guess I'm finding myself going through a tough patch and find this site is so helpful. Thanks to everyone!
We love you to the moon and back!

WarriorModeMom

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #303 on: January 09, 2017, 09:22:03 PM »
My name is Lesley.  My husband of nearly 18 years lost his 16 month battle to cancer three months ago.  We were hopeful that one of the clinical trials would keep this aggressive cancer at bay.  But none of the treatments worked.  Nothing worked.  To watch such a brilliant, disciplined and determined man wither away before my eyes was heart-wrenching, to say the least.

He was being treated at Memorial Sloan-Kettering for most of last year. We have two tween daughters.  For the girls and me, our day-to-day lives are the same as they have been since March of last year – starting and ending the day without him here.  We just know he isn’t coming home for a long weekend this time…..  Because our daily routines have been the same (except for the three weeks he spent in home hospice) I don’t think it has truly hit us yet.

I have been in warrior mode since June of 2015.  Not survival mode, because to me, that just means barely hanging on by a thread.  But I also know that a good warrior knows when to let other tribe members help to mend and polish the shield.  Thankfully, we have an extraordinary tribe.  Our family couldn’t have managed without the faculty and families of the girls’ school; the hospice grief counselor; our church; as well as our longtime, all around good friends.

I have learned to say “yes” and “thank you” when friends ask if they can help in any way.  One good friend is a comic book illustrator.  When he asked if he could help, I told him I needed a muse; a warrior I could see in comic book form.  She is my profile pic. 

My husband was the strict disciplinarian.  I had been letting the girls have a bit more iPad and tv time.  But I’ve just found out that they have mostly shut down at school (since December and not much has changed since returning last week).   I guess I’ve shut down a bit, as well.  By allowing them more electronics time, I’ve been able to zone out, too.  I know we’ll get through this wilderness, but it won’t be easy.

Thank you for listening.  I look forwarding to getting to know my fellow warriors here.  I know I will learn a lot from you all; gleaning nuggets of wisdom and guidance.
Infinity Warrior

kaleighmorgan13

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #304 on: January 26, 2017, 05:58:14 PM »
I'm Kaleigh. My fiancé was killed instantly in a car wreck on December 19, 2016.

No warning. No chance to say goodbye. No nothin.

I am lost.

momof2obs

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #305 on: January 30, 2017, 01:53:20 PM »
Hello, I'm Linda.  My husband lost his brave fight against cancer on Halloween morning.  We had celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary four days earlier as he lay in hospice.  He was 50 years young (I just turned 49 last week and am left wondering what to expect next)  I have two children (13 & 11) and my focus has been primarily helping them with the loss of their father.  I have to say that since he was sick most of 2016 and in hospice the final five weeks of his life, they at least had the opportunity to say their goodbyes.

I stumbled across this site and am grateful I did as I see that there are others who are experiencing what I have been going through.

Wheelerswife

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #306 on: January 30, 2017, 02:17:55 PM »
Hi, Linda,

Welcome to our club.  I'm sorry you had to pay the price of admission.  I'm glad you found us - we really do understand what you are experiencing.  I don't have children myself, but I was widowed at 47 (and again at 51).  If you are like me, I spent hours reading on the precursor to this site after I lost my first husband.  It was helpful to know that what I was experiencing was normal.

Try to take care of yourself and take help when it feels comfortable.  Read and post...and hug your kids if they will let you!

Hugs,

Maureen

Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

Empathy  Developer  Responsibility  Adaptability Connectedness

Nicky11

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #307 on: February 02, 2017, 04:19:14 PM »
Hi, I'm Nicky. My husband was on a deployment to Afghanistan and returned with a backache just about a year ago. He was sent to a chiropractor, physical therapy, pain management. He was a soldier for over 20 years. Soldiers get backaches. We never thought... His doctor finally sent him for imaging and we found out on May 13th that he had a metastatic tumor on his spine. Although he had numerous tests and biopsies, his primary cancer wasn't found and we spent the last three and a half weeks of his life in the ICU. He passed on August 11, 2016.

The army moved me back to our hometown. We had just purchased our house a few months before Brian passed, planning to spend a couple years fixing it up before he retired.

Time is a weird thing. In a little over a week it will be six months... and it still feels like yesterday.

Julester3

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #308 on: February 02, 2017, 06:31:49 PM »
So sorry Nicky you have to join us here. I am sure the frustration for you is going through all the medical paces to find his problem for so long before really finding the cancer. It must have been hard to watch him those last few weeks. We are here for you. Time is funny in our position. I know it's changing and progressing but it just seems like yesterday my husband went to tennis and just died. I think we function in a time vacuum. I'm 10 months out and I don't know how I got here. Hugs for you today.

WarriorModeMom

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #309 on: February 11, 2017, 09:38:20 PM »
Linda,

I am so sorry about your loss.  My husband was also 50.  He died last  October after a year and a half battle with cancer. Our girls are 12 and almost 10.

My mother-in-law lives on LI and we historically visit every summer and Christmas.
Infinity Warrior

jgib

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #310 on: March 30, 2017, 12:31:07 PM »
Hello, I'm Joan.
I am not sure if I fit in the ' young widow ' category but I don't feel old yet!
My husband was killed in a farming accident just over 3 years ago now.  He was only 46..... Because we worked for other people, managing their cattle properties, I not only lost the man I loved with all my heart, I lost my home and way of life.
I have been finding me again, as an individual and not part of a team.  I like me.
The anniversary this year, Jan 31, was the toughest yet I think.  Maybe because I am less numb now.  I am living for me now and it is interesting.  We never had kids so I am truly on my own.
I have been lurking here for a bit and thought it was time to introduce myself.  :).
 Hello all....

PeaceLoveLinny

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #311 on: March 31, 2017, 10:45:14 AM »
Hello, I'm Lindsay. 
My husband passed away suddenly from a congenital heart defect on June 25th, 2016; He was only 37.  Matt and I had been together since I was 17.  We were married for almost 11 years before his passing and have 3 beautiful children.   I always knew that there was a chance he would be taken from me too soon, but I was not prepared, at 34, to be a young widow, explaining to my three small children that their father was gone.  It's been 9 months now.  The grief comes in waves for me and my children.  It's so hard.  But, we wake up each day and keep moving forward.  I was glad to find this group. 
That's the basics.

WifeLess

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #312 on: March 31, 2017, 01:27:09 PM »
jgib and PeaceLoveLinny,

Welcome to Young Widow Forum. I hope you will find a measure of comfort knowing that there are many of us traveling the same difficult road you are on.

Sorry for the tragic losses that brought you here.

--- WifeLess


RyanAmysMom

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #313 on: March 31, 2017, 09:08:27 PM »
PeaceLoveLinney - I, too, lost my husband to congenital heart defect in July of 2015.  I'm sorry to hear of your loss. 

Winnie

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Re: introduce yourself here
« Reply #314 on: April 01, 2017, 09:17:40 PM »
Hi.. I hope I'm posting this the right way. I've been a widow for three years now. My husband was 49 when he died and I was 46. We have two children who are now 25 and 20. He fought a valiant battle against lung cancer for 10 months before he died in our bed. My children and I holding him. I've never posted on any message boards. I write musings on my notes on my phone to get out my feelings. It's been theee years and I still feel stuck in quicksand. Only people who have known a partners loss can understand this. Life goes on. My friends and co workers have gone on. Since my husbands death I have had to catastrophic illnesses. Respiratory failure and coma after a surgery that necessitated a 6 month hospital stay, and 3 months ago I had a pulmonary aneurysm. Another 3 weeks in hospital, intubated and feeding tube. I am better and back to work but needless to say my children and I are traumatized, overwhelmed and angry.In three years time our whole world was upended. I miss my husband with an ache deep in my very being as my children miss their father with a fierce intensity. Everyone around me thinks I am "strong, brave & resilient @. They are wrong.