Young Widow Forum > General Discussion

Some Of The Most Insensitive Things That People Have Said

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Early On: "Some of the neighbors think that you aren't grieving enough." (You should see me behind closed doors or with those that I trust).

Going to the Optometrist. This was at about 7 months:

The other day I was at the optometrist office. I had requested a copy of Cindy's charges from last year. It was supposed to be waiting for me.

They didn't have it ready, so I gave them her name and DOB. The receptionist looked at me and said: I show that she is dead. She said it in the tone of: I see that you have changed your phone number.

The employee sitting next to her turned and looked at her in a state of disbelief. That employee then looked up at me and started crying.

I replied: Yes indeed, she is dead.

There had been some other sadness earlier that day - so that kind of just added to that. By about 9:00 PM I actually started to find it somewhat humorous that she was so clueless.

If I would have been on my toes, I would have responded to her:

"As coroner I must report, I thoroughly examined her. And she's not only merely dead, she's really most sincerely dead."


Shit People Say to Widows

My winner in this category after 5 years of some truly mind blowing nuggets:

"You are so lucky, you have options now."  If it had been handy, I do believe I would have purse-slapped her.   :o

At Thanksgiving dinner with my DH's family, his uncle, quite loudly, asks me if I've starting dating yet.  With all eyes on me, I say no.

His reply?

"Huh, it's not natural for someone your age not to be dating".

Um...ok....maybe I'm not dating because your nephew died and I just don't feel like it yet.  I should have flung a spoonful of mashed potatoes at his head.

At the cemetery,  3 days after he unexpectedly died, buying the plots...  "You sure you want two? You are young and pretty, you'll probably marry again."

Former best friend... "If you think you should be crying about B and you aren't, call me and I'll do it.  I miss him so much."

My own mother, after seeing my new hair cut at abou 9 months out... Wow, you've bounced back.  I'm so happy for you.  There's a guy in my office..."


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