Author Topic: Accident update...  (Read 3266 times)

SoVerySad

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Accident update...
« on: May 24, 2015, 02:17:28 PM »
The drunk driver who crashed into us was sentenced this week. He ended up only being charged with DUI with the highest tier blood alcohol content - no charges at all related to hitting us. It was the same as if he had only been pulled over and never caused a crash which caused my daughter to need to be cut out of our vehicle, completely demolished our mini-van, and caused me to need surgery and 3 months of rehab. It is hard to understand.

Apparently there is one way the impact upon us of his choice to drink and drive was recognized. Because I requested to talk to the Asst. District Attorney about the impact (which I only learned I had the right to do by contacting MADD), he wasn't eligible for the Accelerated Rehab Program which would have allowed the DUI conviction to be wiped off his record as if that had never happened as well since it was his first arrest. Apparently he was quite unhappy that he didn't get that option. He wanted to get my medical records to try to prove I wasn't "injured enough". Such an inconvenience this injury of mine has been to him. >:( I was prepared to attend his sentencing to speak to the judge (as was also my right), but an error was made and they did the sentencing without me knowing it would be done.

On a positive note, my wrist is really healing well. I finished rehab this week and will need to continue with my at-home program for several more months to continue to build the strength back up. My anxiety over driving is improving a little as well as I continue to force myself to do so. I'm so ready to get all this behind us. That said, I plan to get more involved in trying to see the DUI laws become more strict in my state. It shouldn't take someone getting permanently injured or killed for there to be more severe consequences. I really hope he won't drink and drive again.

Without you, Baby, I'm not me.

Virgo

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #1 on: May 24, 2015, 04:04:16 PM »
He will. The laws need to change! My LH was a K9 officer. He had several repeat offenders. Even some without a valid driver's license that chose to get behind the wheel while under the influence. The officers get tired of arresting the same violators repeatedly too. One year my LH had over 200 DUI arrests, terrible. It is so selfish and irresponsible to drink and drive.

I hope your wrist continues to heal well and your anxiety while driving lessens.
Jen

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." Dr. Seuss

Kamcho

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #2 on: May 24, 2015, 04:45:28 PM »
I've heard anecdotally that my state does not care over much about drunk drivers hurting people. LH said it was because a former and long serving governor was a DUIer himself, and wanted leniency to cover his own ass. No idea if that is true or not.  I had an acquaintance whose daughter is to this day disabled, brain damaged, poor quality of life due to a self obsessed frat boy in his mommy's SUV hitting her as she was coming home from work. He walked away with no injuries. He served no jail time to my knowledge and dodged the restitution he was ordered to pay by hiding his assets in his girlfriend's name. I guess since it's a disease and not a choice, it's ok to inebriate one's self, get behind the wheel and ruin someone else's life, right? 

I'm sorry he got off so lightly, and that you were hurt. Life really is not fair. I am glad that you are recovering.

To everyone else: If some asshole is swerving all over the road, be they drunk or texting, you can call 911, and report an erratic driver. Give your location, the make and model of the vehicle and the plate if you can.

Wheelerswife

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #3 on: May 24, 2015, 05:12:24 PM »
SVS,

I'm happy to hear that your recovery is going so well.  It just isn't right, though, that the man who caused your traumas (including those of your daughter) isn't being held to more meaningful restitution.  I certainly don't understand the laws surrounding drunk driving or injury crashes stemming from driving under the influence.  It would seem that he should be subjected to some discipline for causing the mental and physical havoc on your lives.  It seems he isn't too remorseful, eh?  I hope that he will take some time to reflect and come to a better understanding of the impact of his action.

Hugs,

Maureen

PS...I hope to see you at the British Invasion bago!
Life is short.  Love with all you've got. 

Barry 11/29/55-9/22/09       John  1/16/57-1/11/14

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Jen

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #4 on: May 24, 2015, 06:39:44 PM »
I'm appalled and horrified at the legal outcome-- so not right-- but I'm glad you're recovering. (((((((HUGS))))))))
I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy the one, I will indulge the other. ~Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

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MissingSquish

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #5 on: May 24, 2015, 07:23:14 PM »
Exactly what Just Jen said. Glad to hear your recovery is going well.
Gone but not forgotten.....my Squish.

Miss you forever baby girl, my Pru!

lcoxwell

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #6 on: May 24, 2015, 08:35:40 PM »
I agree with the others in saying that it is shocking and appalling that the man, who did this to your family, did not get more of a sentence. I also agree with everyone, in saying that I am happy you are healing as well as you are, now.  ((((Hugs))))
"The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude." - Thornton Wilder

Thank you, my dearest Kenneth, for loving me and for giving me the best 13 years of my life.

nonesuch

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #7 on: May 24, 2015, 09:13:35 PM »
I remember when the laws started to tighten up: maybe 40 or so years ago.  I asked someone why it took until the 70s to do it.   He said, "How many state senators and reps do you suppose have a couple for the road before they head home for the weekend? Don't you think when an accident like that occurred they say to themselves, There but for the grace of God go I?"

In my last home town, a fellow looked into the record of a drunk driver who had hit and permanently disabled his brother.  The drunk had numerous arrests for drunk driving and driving without a license.  I suppose you can prohibit him from registering a car,  but not his wife, or brother, or child.  You can't stop him from getting in the car and turning the key. *sigh*  Although my husband was an alcoholic, I'm not a true believer in the "disease" theory. I think the analogy is useful to family, so they don't blame themselves for the drinking or think they can somehow control it, or cure the alcoholic.

Actually, my husband *did not* have a key to my car. 

In your state, are you allowed to file a civil suit against the driver?



linda5

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #8 on: May 24, 2015, 09:18:46 PM »
SVS, so happy to hear that your wrist is healing.  It's not right or fair that he gets off so easily.  I really don't understand why our laws are so lenient for drunk driving. 

Prayers being said for continued healing for you and your daughter.

serpico

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #9 on: May 24, 2015, 09:27:45 PM »
In your state, are you allowed to file a civil suit against the driver?

This was my first thought as well. A civil court is is likely the best place to actually punish this dude.
'I think I got some of your pickle'

BrokenHeart2

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #10 on: May 24, 2015, 09:44:39 PM »
Glad to hear you are healing well. As for that idiot drunk driver, try to find solace in what goes around comes around. You may never know but it will.
Hugs to you SVS
I don't want it to be his legacy that his death destroyed me.
I need to honour his life by rebuilding my life.

Trying

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #11 on: May 25, 2015, 12:55:32 AM »
I'm so happy to hear you are healing well and echo what the others have said about how appalling it is that his punishment wasn't more severe.
You will forever be my always.

SoVerySad

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #12 on: May 26, 2015, 05:43:51 AM »
Thank you all for your replies.

Kamcho, your post about calling the police is important. At the crash scene, a man walked up to us and said he felt terrible about us being hit. He told me the guy who hit us had been driving very erratically behind him for some time, before eventually passing him and subsequently hitting us. He said at a stop sign he had considered putting his car in park and going back to ask what his problem was. He didn't, because he was afraid the guy might have a gun. It would have been better had he called the police.

In PA, as I understand it, we can choose to have tort coverage or not. I do and have hired an attorney. It seems the case will be against his liability coverage under his auto insurance. I also have under-insured motorist coverage through my own insurance. It has been a learning experience for me in how these coverages work in my state. When I bought the new van, I just kept everything the same as DH had it set up as he took care of that. If you are in a similar situation, I recommend you familiarize yourself with the coverage you have. Here in PA, your own car insurance pays your medical bills. My husband had chosen a lower benefit amount there, presumably because at the time we had great health insurance coverage through his work. Unfortunately, I no longer have that same great coverage, so I may well end up paying some of the medical bills (which hopefully my attorney can recoup for me). My attorney has been able to recommend some changes to my policy for better coverage.

Nonesuch, the issue of those driving with suspended licenses is substantial. Many people do it and it is hard to police. There is currently a bill being proposed here in PA to require ignition breathalyzer interlocks after a first DUI offense. I think it would be a good idea, so I'll be lending my support in trying to get it passed.

Thank you again.
Without you, Baby, I'm not me.

MissinGrizz

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #13 on: May 26, 2015, 08:47:03 AM »
Can you hit him with a civil suit?

Lmsmdm

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Re: Accident update...
« Reply #14 on: May 26, 2015, 06:21:57 PM »
So glad you are healing! Awful that the prick didn't get more!!
You hate me don't you? Yup, so much I married you twice! :)