Young Widow Forum

Specific Situations => Suicide/Addiction/Mental Illness/Abuse => Topic started by: Ruth on July 10, 2016, 02:19:19 PM

Title: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
Post by: Ruth on July 10, 2016, 02:19:19 PM
Hey everyone,

I'm still rather new here, but did want to post in this forum. To be honest I 'belong' here for two reasons, the first being that my husband was abusive at times (which was considered normal in our community, so I don't really feel the need to talk about it here at this point in time) and the second is that he died due to violence. My husband tried to do the right thing and got killed for it. I was wondering, are there others out here who went through something similar?

Ruth
Title: Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
Post by: Wheelerswife on July 10, 2016, 05:09:00 PM
Hi, Ruth,

I can't say that I can relate to losing my husbands to violence, but there have been people here in the past who lost a spouse to murder.  The two that I can think about are perhaps about 6 years out right now and I don't know if either of them checks in on this forum any more.  Still, I'm glad you spoke up about your specific circumstances,  a non-legal "marriage", abuse within a relationship, and death with violence, because some people may have experienced these circumstances and they may not feel comfortable speaking up first.  Your posts may have several people now realizing that they aren't the only ones who are trying to cope with the emotional ramifications of similar experiences. 

I'm glad you found us and that you feel comfortable posting about what is on your mind.

Maureen
Title: Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
Post by: TofinoMan on July 11, 2016, 01:37:27 AM
Hi Ruth.
No I can't personally identify with it, but I am ve4y sorry for your loss.
My wife was running with her run club she was with for years.
She slipped running a country trail and landed on her head.
So while she died of head trauma, it was an accident and not violence.
Title: Re: Spouse died due to violence, any others?
Post by: SemperFidelis on July 26, 2016, 02:29:37 PM
Hi Ruth. My husband died of suicide. Not violence.

But he was mentally ill (severe ptsd from combat)  and was VERY violent for the first few years of our marriage. I did believe he would end up killing me. However, this issue was eradicated with the introduction of medication for his ptsd.....So was not an issue for the final two years of his life.

It is very surreal to look back on....I know I have looked at it with new eyes now.