Young Widow Forum

Time Frame => Shock Wears Off, Reality Sets In ( 6 to 12 months) => Topic started by: KrypticKat on April 26, 2017, 12:30:58 PM

Title: They just can't understand
Post by: KrypticKat on April 26, 2017, 12:30:58 PM
Those who have not walked this walk just cannot understand.

It doesn't end after the funeral.
Just because I don't talk about him as much doesn't mean he's not on my mind. He's ALWAYS on my mind.
Going through some of his belongings doesn't equal progress. This is not a good way to see how I'm doing.
Even though I smile sometimes it does not mean I don't still feel profound sadness. Widows can feel lots of things at the same time. We are pros at this.
I am not who I used to be. I cannot be that person anymore. That person was with my husband.
I am still me though. I know that's a contradiction. I see the world in a way those who have not lost cannot see.
I have never felt stronger because I am surviving. No other challenge will be this hard. I have also never felt weaker because I truly understand you cannot control everything. It is a terrifying truth.
I am so glad to have found this place to share.

Thank you all of you for understanding. <3

Kat

Title: Re: They just can't understand
Post by: MR on April 26, 2017, 01:00:37 PM
Did you write? As it so true.. Beautiful made me feel better especially

I have never felt stronger because I am surviving. No other challenge will be this hard. I have also never felt weaker because I truly understand you cannot control everything. It is a terrifying truth.


Thanks
Manoj
Title: Re: They just can't understand
Post by: Mizpah on April 27, 2017, 08:35:47 AM
So true, all of it.  Your clarity and honesty will continue to give you the strength to walk our path.  Thinking of you
Title: Re: They just can't understand
Post by: KrypticKat on April 30, 2017, 02:52:54 PM
Thank you. I did write that first post. Just my random widow ramblings. I originally tried grief groups to help me on this journey but found it was a bad fit. Being a young widow it's hard to relate with others at times. This place has been so helpful.

I read a quote today that really resonated with me:

"Closure is a word for people who have never really suffered. There’s no such thing. Just try to “manage” your loss. Put it in perspective. You will always have some regret and doubt about your loss. You may always second guess yourself. If only you had said this, or tried that."

I don't let go of the loss. I just learn how to carry it with me.
Title: Re: They just can't understand
Post by: beth_krkswidow on May 16, 2017, 03:47:54 PM
Omg, KK, Perfect

Every word.

Every word.