Young Widow Forum

Young Widow Forum => General Discussion => Topic started by: Alexswife on April 13, 2015, 07:33:45 PM

Title: Tears
Post by: Alexswife on April 13, 2015, 07:33:45 PM
I've cried so much that I can't form tears anymore. My heart is so broken that I don't know how it continues to beat.

Today we would've been married for three years. The three months and five days that we were married were the absolute best days of my life. I've reached my peak, life will never be better than it was back then.
 I miss him.
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: MissingSquish on April 13, 2015, 08:28:00 PM
Hugs Alexswife. Anniversaries without them are really tough. I know losing Alex has torn apart your life so much.

Do you have a friend or family member that you can spend some of tomorrow with?  Maybe you can go for a walk or treat yourself to a manicure in his memory. Take care of yourself and do something positive for you.
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: A Tout Jamais on April 13, 2015, 11:18:48 PM

"The Heart won't forget"

The heart won't forget
Neither the love nor the pain
It always keeps track

Of that which matters --
Nothing can ever erase
The ones we have loved

It's written inside
With an indelible seal
And can't be wiped out

Now and forever
With each pulse and each beat
It brings them along

They're always a part
Wherever life takes us
They walk at our side

Our love shall remain
Unto ages of ages
Two souls intertwined

Now and forever
Belonging to each other
Until time stands still

~~ A Tout Jamais

Wishing you healing of your broken heart!

(((HUGS))) to you, Alexswife!


Title: Re: Tears
Post by: canadiangirl on April 14, 2015, 05:23:34 AM
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: MrsT85 on April 14, 2015, 06:48:16 AM
((HUGS)) AW.  I'm so sorry.  It's amazing and terrible how the anniversaries can hit us so hard. 

I hope today is at least a little easier. 
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: Catnip on April 14, 2015, 12:43:06 PM
Hugs to you.
Here are the words to a beautiful song. Go to you tube to play it:

Now and Forever
 -Carole King

Now and forever, you are a part of me
And the memory cuts like a knife
Didn't we find the ecstasy, didn't we share the daylight
When you walked into my life

Now and forever, I'll remember
All the promises still unbroken
And think about all the words between us
That never needed to be spoken

We had a moment, just one moment
That will last beyond a dream, beyond a lifetime
We are the lucky ones
Some people never get to do all we got to do
Now and forever, I will always think of you

Didn't we come together, didn't we live together
Didn't we cry together
Didn't we play together, didn't we love together
And together we lit up the world

I miss the tears, I miss the laughter
I miss the day we met and all that followed after
Sometimes I wish I could always be with you
The way we used to do
Now and forever, I will always think of you
Now and forever, I will always be with you
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: Alexswife on April 14, 2015, 08:11:49 PM
Thanks for the support, y'all. I feel like I've been holding my breath for the past few days and now I am starting to exhale. This awful, no good day is almost over. It doesn't matter though, tomorrow might not be a special date but he will still be dead. I will still be a widow and our lives will still be over.

Special date or not. Tomorrow will hurt just like always.
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: SimiRed on April 15, 2015, 01:19:06 PM
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: Baylee627 on April 15, 2015, 01:21:21 PM
Thinking of you, lil missy. I'm so very sorry. The *special* dates just plain hurt.

No getting around that.

Hugs, sweet girl.

Title: Re: Tears
Post by: Alexswife on April 15, 2015, 06:13:27 PM
Thanks, y'all.

I'm in so much pain today. I found this picture on his computer yesterday. This was right after our wedding. I can't tell you the countless number of times that we rode for hours in that car and held each other's hand. Holding his hand was on of the most amazing things I've ever done. He had a little scar on his thumb. I used to run my finger over that scar all of the time. He was so gentle and kind. I feel like I'm drowning and I'll never come up for air again.

( (
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: lcoxwell on April 15, 2015, 07:34:07 PM
Your picture is absolutely wonderful. I am so sorry that you are hurting so much, and hope that you can find peace, soon.
Title: Re: Tears
Post by: MrsDan on April 17, 2015, 01:24:10 PM
Hugs A, that picture is beautiful. I don't think I have anything like that. I saw a couple holding hands the other day, and he pointed and something, taking her had with his as he did. And I thought, I miss that, the physical sensation of holding hands with someone and they gesture like that, and your hand goes along for the ride. It's something so nuanced, so granular that I don't think anybody who hasn't gone through this would understand. And yeah, the whole, I might get through this day, this hurdle but so what? He'll still be dead? I get that too.