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Love2fish

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Everything posted by Love2fish

  1. Is it going to be August AGAIN? Why I don't wear Hawaiian shirts anymore. DW preferred them so I wore them because her eye became my eye. I think that when she left I retired the style out of respect. Maybe I'll dig one out in a couple weeks to remind me that it's August.
  2. Yes it is in Wells at a condo at Village By The Sea: www.Vbts.com People are coming from various directions. Let someone know via PM and we will do our best to help everyone get here that wants to be here. There is a commuter train from Boston and the station is just a few miles from the bago. If we have any other lurkers who might have questions but don’t wish to post here send me a private message and I will keep you in the loop.
  3. As a newly minted septuagenarian I can testify that nothing is the same. 😏 But it can be just as good and even better seasoned with a little more wisdom re the things that last. I met a widow when I was less than two months out. This lady was about my mothers age She gave me some precious council in the form of her Love story told to me over breakfast at the assisted living facility. . She was born into a comfortable life. Attended finishing school. Married for love, had a great family as well as a city home, a ranch with stables, and a sailing yacht. The family of four crewed the yacht themselves following the leaf change down the Maine coast in The autumns. It was a fairytale life. Until he died young and she thought it was over. Her kids kept after her for years to get back into life. She finally relented to accept a blind date with a widower. She took a breath from telling me the story before almost knocking me over with “Then things got really good!” She ended the “lesson” by telling me she had to hurry off to her bridge game. She and two of the other women were completely blind. The fourth had sight so she was the score keeper. “And we have a ball!, You can always choose to be happy” she wanted me to know.
  4. I would suggest also looking at Portsmouth airport, formerly known as Pease AFB. That is the closest of all and would be no problem for one of us to shoot down and pick you up in about an hours time. The problem is that there are not many flights available. If it has to be Boston then consider taking the bus from Logan to Portsmouth where we could pick you up easily. There is also a train, called the Northeaster from Boston but I have never taken it so I can’t comment on how convenient it is. Driving from here to Logan and back can kill ½ a day or more. Next best would be Portland which is about 45 minutes from the bago. Manchester is also a nice small airport that is easy to get in or out of but its about a 3 hour round trip. Maybe that would work if someone is coming from NH and wouldn’t mind picking you up.
  5. I agree about the randomness of dates but there is nothing random about needing a good break-down cry once in awhile. If you need it go for it. Saturday will be a new day. I hope it will be a good one for you RAM
  6. We feel things so much more intensely after our loss. A minor bump can feel like a brick wall. I try to remember these lyrics, they help me remember that no harm was intended “just because I’m hurting doesn’t mean you did anything wrong”
  7. I love it. I’m going to start working on mine now. Thanks for the story!
  8. I agree with you T2B agreeing with Portside. It is indeed an energy thing. I would like to add that an introvert should not expect a tougher time. I say that as a lifelong introvert myself. I only grew out of it when I began dating and realized that I had come into my prime in many ways. I made mistakes but I learned a little each time. I am still an introvert and I am comfortable with that, but I also have a sweet lady to love me even when I need to be alone.
  9. Interesting to see how differently we each deal with these things. My wedding ring aint' coming off. It's ink
  10. So sorry you are here Heather. Your story sounds just like the last days for DW as well. It was the worst of times. Hug
  11. I would love to be able to cross that one 👯‍♀️👯‍♀️👯‍♂️ off my bucket list! but no, I am going to be seeing the show with NG on the 12th. I'm just giving Y'all a heads up bc the show will be great and tickets will probably get sold out. Fri. night looks like 70% sold, Sat. night is 80% sold and Sun. matinee is even worse.
  12. All in favor say aye. new business: I have no idea how much time you all wish to spend engaged in wid talk or if a break to catch a show would be appropriate. The Ogunquit Playhouse is 20 minutes away, the show will be Jersey Boys. The Ogunquit Playhouse always does a great job with everything. Broadway quality shows.
  13. I was at my first bago tonight for dinner with friends. I think I was the only wid there. Business. I make a motion that we hold this Southern Maine bago on September 14 and 15. Do I have a second?
  14. "Nobody gets it" You are so spot on with that Steph. It can feel so depressing listening to people who want to help but don't have a clue. I hope that soon you will be able to say "Almost nobody gets it" That will be the moment when you realize that you are not completely alone. For me it happened in my local credit union. It was my first trip in to deposit checks. DW had always been the one with that chore. The teller did not know me but she recognized the name from the obits. She said she knew what I was going through because she lost her husband very recently. We held up the line for what seemed like forever while we cried our eyes out, not caring a whit what everyone else was thinking around us. A few times like that pulled me through the much more common "don't get it times".
  15. It looks like this thing is going to happen All we need now is for one of you lurker people to chime in and set the date. I know you are out there I just don't know which dates are going to work for you. Hint: Say something like "I could make it the weekend of September 21 & 22."
  16. Good for you WW. Seems that you figured what needed to be done pretty quickly. Looking back now I think that if a few of the ladies I dated had been so astute they might have saved us both some time
  17. How about a weekend between September 14 and October 7? Pick the date. Available for a 2 night Widowbago. 2 BR condo sleeps 6, full kitchen, 1 3/4 bath, 1 king, 2 queen, 1 sleep sofa, in a family friendly kind of resort. The town is a popular family, beach, vacation area. Lots of great restaurants nearby, a few of which can handle large partys. The resort has indoor and outdoor pools + game room. I said sleep 6 right? It could be 6 guys or 6 ladies or a mix, as long as everyone is 100% comfortable with the mix. No cost to anyone staying other than food and help with cleanup. Lots of great restaurants nearby, a few of which can handle large groups or we can cook in the condo (by “we" I mean “you” :-) I would be participating as a widow but not staying at the condo. I have another place a few miles down the road that I use during the summer. This condo is something that DW and I bought both to use and for income 25+ years ago. You would be doing her memory an honor by attending. It's my hope that the wids who stay in the condo be the ones who have the greater distance to travel and or the ones who are less affluent. If more than 6 are interested then maybe those of you within driving distance would commute or rent another condo from the complex or the resort next door. There are also hotels nearby with reasonable shoulder season rates. I have been vacationing in the area for over 30 years and will be happy to advise re. restaurants etc. If this happens it will be my first widowbago, please be gentle. Any suggestions will be welcomed.
  18. Ladies, I am going to be as straight as I can about the guys you have to watch out for. I have seen the enemy and he is me. My style was extremely simple and effective. I was (and still am) honest about my feelings. It was always true love. I was believable because it was always true. And it usually failed after a few months. More times than I want to admit, it failed. 2 hearts were broken each time. I still feel pain from each of those failures. From the view of a casual observer I probably looked like a Lothario. I was not a Lothario, I was an easily charmed Dobie Gillis. I am hopefully out of that phase. I’ve been making just one woman miserable for over a year and a half. If I am lucky she will continue to continue. I am out of the game but I believe there are a few spiritual clones of me still in circulation. Be careful out there.
  19. That someone would be the ladies who do have sex on the first or second date. Not trying to be cute here but I think that 10% of the women I met were of that inclination. My PCP warned me that STDs among seniors are getting out of hand. She attributed it to mature women feeling liberated from risk of pregnancy combined with ignorance of real risks.
  20. This is just my opinion and I have not yet been to a Widowbago anything. I think that becoming a member increases your commitment to the group and maybe helps protect people from grifters and such.
  21. Good attitude LF. I think you just had an unusual unlucky streak. After 141 M&Gs I don't think I had any last minute cancellations. Maybe 1/2 doz. late arrivals but 50% of those were my fault so there's no gender bias in that stat. I'm sure your age is a factor as CW pointed out. Busy lifestyles for you kids. The women I was meeting were probably close to your mother's age and I'm sure you will agree that your mother would never weasel out of a date.
  22. Not TMI Hachi. I understand the drought too. Ours was the result of anxiety/depression for years before the cancer took over. "In retrospect, it was too soon (emotionally)." applies to me as well but let's not beat ourselves up about that. Everything important happens too soon in life. Tip for those whose mature bodies seem to be saying "It's too soon or maybe it's too late". Coconut oil. nuff said?
  23. Thank you for that beautifully written and honestly insightful post.
  24. Totally normal R. I hope you don't mind another guy's opinion. When I was unable to take things to the next level with a woman it was my body telling me that she was not someone I could fall in love with.
  25. I am so jealous LF. You're having all the fun. The best part of most M&Gs is the anticipation. Savor the anticipation. Is one of these the realtor?
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