JacklessSally
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Personal Information
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Date Widowed
11-13-14
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Cause of death
Car Accident
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UnWed Widows, come out come out where ever you are!
JacklessSally replied to JacklessSally's topic in Other Circumstances
@fuchsiasky My fiancee was also legally married to his ex at the time of his death. We did not know they were still married until September of 2014, and he was killed in November. He had only re-signed the paperwork like.. 21 days prior to when he was killed. So they are still legally married and he is legally her widow.. -
Fuck Jan 26th... NationalSpouseDay... great reminder that my love and I couldnt get married before some asshole took his life.Thanks for reminding me i'm alone, and he is gone. Stupid made up calendar bullshit. (Sorry if that sounds terrible for all you lovely people who had the married life, I'm just bitter)
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First time posting in this thread Post angelversary slump, just hanging out in his hoodie in bed with the dog.
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Cross Post - 1 year - What did you do?
JacklessSally replied to sdarrah1130's topic in Beyond the First Year (1+ years)
The year is coming up quickly. I have taken the day off from work and plan on being a lazy bum and dealing with the emotions as they come. I will be alone the night before and into the day, I am not looking forward to that part. I've been pretty numb for the last several months with the exception of small outbursts of emotions. I am afraid that I will be a useless blubbering mess in bed all day. -
Today is my 30th birthday. Ive cried off and on for the last week thinking about today. I do not want to face today. I do not want to be starting the next decade of my life without him. I got to celebrate his 40th birthday with him, why didn't he get to celebrate my 30th birthday with me. Of course I am happy we got to celebrate my 29th birthday together. It is a memory I will cling onto, but I cant help but feel like all of this shit is unfair. All I want for my birthday is for him to come home..
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In Blaine's 20's he had a child, he and his girlfriend gave their son up for adoption. When his son would have been turning 18, Blaine decided to get clean and start a new life. He hoped that his son would come looking for him. The day of Blaine's funeral my SOOL and I found Blaine's son on FB... A few months ago my MOOL for up the nerve to call him. Spencer was sobbing he was so excited that he was found by his father's family. My MOOL did not tell him that Blaine had been killed. Last night the house phone rang and it was Spencer's adoptive mother. Blaine's mom and her talked for a while and my MOOL had to break the news that Blaine had been killed... My poor MOOL sobbed all night.. She was finally able to have a relationship with her only grandson, but it took losing her oldest child to do so. How I wish I could reverse time and found Spencer when Blaine was still alive. All of this has sent us all back down the grief hole. It's insane how something so amazing like being reunited with family can be so utterly heartbreaking .
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The headstone is placed
JacklessSally replied to Strongerthanb4's topic in Shock Wears Off, Reality Sets In ( 6 to 12 months)
This was two weekends ago for me. We had been decorating my fiancee's grave since day one, but now that the stone is there makes it way harder to trick myself into thinking this isn't really happening. ((big hugs)) -
Books - Resource and Good Reads
JacklessSally replied to Ginger's topic in Books, Quotes, Poems, and Songs
I can't stop crying Grief and Recovery, A compassionate guide. by John D. Martin & Frank D Ferris -
Drown by Bring Me the Horizon
JacklessSally replied to Virgo's topic in Books, Quotes, Poems, and Songs
1- Yah for bring me the horizon! 2. I guess I need to listen to this song now. -
Jen, when you were first going through this, I didn't understand. As his death date gets farther and farther away.. I am starting to seriously get it. ((big hug)) I'm just a text away.