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sudnlysngl

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  1. sudnlysngl

    O.T just be a listening therapist to me

    Sugerbell I'm so sorry! That's so messed up what our parents do to us not thinking how it f**king stays with us for the rest of our lives. I'm happy to see you say that your ok, cause girl I'm not! I guess I should say that differently, I'm not postal or anything like that, but I am totally isolating myself, I'm so hurt that I let such an asshole into my life that stole everything I had, and caused me to have to sell my home I had with my dh so I could survive now. None of the people from my past, including my siblings have come back into my life since my dh died 11.5 yrs ago. My best friend can't , she died, but the others, well no reason, they just decided I don't exist anymore either....I did the counseling and all that crap, and just don't think I can take anymore, ya know? Just want you to know I get what you mean about parents screwing us up, cause my mom was abusive to me big time, then all of this. Proud of you, cause I remember when we joined.
  2. sudnlysngl

    Need help - completely broken

    Redhed you got this! Please find a good counselor for yourself, and let it all out, then start putting YOURSELF back together. You might find that you will like things differently, and find that you want things differently! Girl, YOU GOT THIS! And it's ok to feel all the things that you are feeling right now. It is, I am going through some of those things myself. I have been shattered by the guy I let into my life, and I married him! He stole all my money, and at the end he started to abuse by poisoning me... Punching holes in the walls of my house, cause I wouldn't put him on my house, he knew the agreement we had, found out he was cheating for over the last 2 years or more. So girl, bad things happen to many of us and we survive! I may not ever trust anyone again, LOL, but I survive, and know that you will too. Now let's pull up our big girl panties , find ourselves, what brings "us" peace and real joy in life, and learn to really live again.... 😊 Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers...
  3. sudnlysngl

    Are there any normal men on dating sites?

    Mike I respect what you said, and appreciate that you gave me more to understand it better. Thank you for that. 😊 Now let me clarify, what I find offensive, is that so many people are acting like players when dating now. It's sad that they find that to be an acceptable way of dating and finding love in the world now. I don't see it being just a male thing. Sadly I've seen some women who do it too. I'm not one of them, but I've seen those who are in the game. For me I don't find you offensive, just the majority of the world offensive, lol. Sorry....
  4. sudnlysngl

    Are there any normal men on dating sites?

    This right here says it ALL..... So many players out there now, dishonest people to have to weed through, and with us all getting "older", we don't have the patience like we used too... Although, I don't know that it's harder for women than men. kind of find that one offensive, just saying. It is 2018 when are men going to learn that we womens don't like being played??? duhhh It's time for all sexes to stop being immature and act like kind, mature, and loving people. How about that?
  5. sudnlysngl

    Grade 3 inoperable glioma

    I'm so sorry to hear about your friend Serpico. I can clearly hear my dh in my head right now saying the one thing that hurt him the most was how everyone treated him like he had the "plague". He just wanted to be treated like they always did, ya know? So tell him bye, say the things you want to say. Like you will miss him , etc. Ask him if there is anything he would like you to do perhaps for him after he is gone. Other than that, just be yourself. Have a beer with him if that is what the two of you used to do. And don't forget to enjoy the time you have with your friend.... I'm sure you will be awesome... Again, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend, and so sorry for his family....
  6. sudnlysngl

    Need help - completely broken

    First I'm sorry your hurting. That said, I absolutely agree with Mike. Of coarse your scared. You never took the time to be alone and process being widowed, grieve, be a mom by YOURSELF, and learn how to process all these things to see that you can and will do it! All of us here will tell you it sucks!, but it can be done. There are those of us (I am one of them) who recoupled after almost 5 yrs, and I just divorced! So nothing is guaranteed, nothing!!! Another thing I would suggest for you is some counseling. That would help you with the grief, the broken relationship, and life.... Best of luck to you. BTW, I am 11.5 yrs out
  7. sudnlysngl

    I have a new job!!

    congratulations !!!! 😀☺️
  8. I agree Mac, but I am finding this harder as I am getting older and a lot less tolerant of some things that others do. Like the lying, cheating, etc. You know the not so nice things that are ever so hurtful to another.... I find I just have no tolerance for those things, never did. Again, I sigh... Perhaps the loneliness is kicking in as the holidays approach or as the realization of what I had and what others have done. Who knows? sighhh…..
  9. I miss that most of all. It is amazing when you have that in your life and with "that" person...… sigh
  10. After 11.5 years I can totally understand wanting to find someone, and totally understand the loneliness. Wanting to find someone who understands what it's like to lose someone you love, etc. But why here? This isn't a dating site, although there have been a few people who have over time that have met in person and developed a relationship that ended up in marriage. I guess seeing that can make some of us hopeful. Knowing that the other person would totally get it! But I am curious....😊
  11. sudnlysngl

    The problem is me.

    I hear you. It's hard after all the stuff we've been through. I did let someone come into my life after 4.5 years. I "thought" I did everything the "right" way by taking time to date for over a year, setting my boundaries, not settling, etc. etc., and I still got royally burnt. So just like anything else, there is no guarantee but we will never have a good outcome either if we don't take the chances! RAM, maybe you might just need to take some time to figure out where your at, and what it is that you want. Then go from there. Don't let others influence you either, really think about YOU and YOUR wants. Good luck....
  12. sudnlysngl

    I'm Tired

    I'm tired. I don't mean sleepy. I mean, after 11.5 years of all the bullshit I have been left with, all the platitudes that we hear , all the crap that the world expects from "us". Damn it I'm tired! I don't want to take the high road anymore. I want to tell the sales person who are being real assholes to stfu and get out of my face already! To do the damn job they are being paid for at the very least, you know what I mean? I'm tired of trying to be nice to these assholes and because they feel entitled or are having a bad day I become their target! wth? Or when I go to the bank and the teller doesn't even take the time to finish her sentence, then looks at me like I'm strange because I don't have a clue what she is talking about? Again, wth? I'm tired..... Then they give me nasty attitude when I ask them politely to please explain, OIY..... Oh, then when she does finally start to repeat herself and explain, she freaking realizes how much she did NOT say the first time, DUH! Paid to have some work done, had some sheds put up. The guy did the sub floors wrong.... He copped a nasty attitude when I asked him a question on the 3rd day passed the day they were supposed to be done. He gets violent, had to call the cops! Now, I have to pay more money, that I don't have, sue the guy and his company, etc. etc. etc...... It just keeps coming, and I'm just sick and really tired! Come on world, how is this stupid crap really happening so much? And then why are you taking it out on everyone else???? DH, where are you????? Oh, have I said I'm tired...… Of it all I really am, I think I might just give up ☹️
  13. sudnlysngl

    Off Topic - Collection Agency

    NEVER TALK TO THEM! That opens you up to them and their illegal tactics! Block them asap! You said you have checked your credit reports, then you are just a random made up target, block them.... There is a lot of articles on these dirt bags now.... and legit creditors leave msgs….
  14. sudnlysngl

    I lost my job today

    Best of luck to you Rooshy! 😉
  15. sudnlysngl

    Some Advice??

    So I have been taking all of your advice. But this person is still "pushing" themselves into some conversations, and/or starting another one when not included. Like a 5 year old having to have the last word! This is NOT a person one can have a talk with, as many will defend them because of their boo hoo oh poor me attitude. I just know if it's making me crazy, it has to be making others crazy to when talking about something and this person ALWAYS makes about them! Again, thanks to those of you who gave some great advice


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