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Wheelerswife

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About Wheelerswife

Hey folks.  This website and its predecessor have been lifelines for me on this widow journey.  I found YWBB about a month after my first husband died.  The day my second husband died, I was surrounded by some people I met just 2 weeks later at a local Widowbago (as well as some others I met after that time).  I hope that people will take advantage of the possibilities for connections with others who can understand the heartache of losing a spouse/partner and others who have learned to keep living with their broken and healing hearts.  I have had the privilege of meeting several people from this site and I have developed virtual friendships with a few others as well.  I may never get to meet the people I have come to care about who live in other countries, but they are still a part of my support system.  I live in the US, but have met wids when I traveled to Canada and Australia (hey - when you go that distance, why not?) as well as across the US. 

Find someone whose post resonates with you and take a small risk with a PM.  You never know - you might find a friend. 

 

Hugs to all of you,

 

Maureen

Personal Information

  • Date Widowed
    09/21/2009
  • Name of Spouse
    DH1 - Barry, DH2 - John
  • Date Widowed
    9/22/2009 1/11/2014
  • Cause of death
    DH1- Respiratory Failure DH2- Cardiac Arrhythmia
  • Spouse's Age
    5356


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  1. Wheelerswife

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Wonderful, Matthew! I hope to someday find the right man for my Chapter 3. Chapters 1and 2 were wonderful, and I don’t want to settle for anything less than that! Maureen
  2. Wheelerswife

    Bago - Northeast/New England - Saturday, December 8th

    We will miss you, Marie!!
  3. Wheelerswife

    16 Years- One Tough Cookie

    Hi, Judy. Thank you you for your beautiful posts and your essay. My heart goes out to you today. I also miss the incredible library of wisdom that was lost when YWBB shut down. I used to read for hours in my early weeks and months. I’m now facing my 10th “everything” without my first husband. I just passed the 10th birthday that he missed, the 10th Thanksgiving that we didn’t host.... I am also coming up on the 5th anniversary of my second husband’s death. I also met him on YWBB. Our relationship was so full of life and passion for living, especially after having been widowed ourselves. His life and his death have had such an impact on my life, but losing him crushed me even more. I fight to keep living and finding purpose. I’m getting there...at whatever pace happens. Persist. Remember. Miss them. But...we have this life in front of us and, for me, at least, I have a drive not to be miserable, so I will continue to persist (often with the support of people I have met along the widow road.) I wish you the best... Maureen
  4. Wheelerswife

    Bago - Northeast/New England - Saturday, December 8th

    Awesome, Loves2fish! Nice reminder to anyone else in New England....we would love to have you for a relaxing afternoon with people who have walked in similar shoes. PM me for my address and phone number.
  5. Wheelerswife

    An eternity and a blink of the eye

    Hi, Kate. Our old board, YWBB, shut down in the spring of 2015. Some resourceful people started this board immediately so that people would have a supportive home. I was 47 when I joined this club. The old board sustained me in my dark hours. I connected with a widower on that board and we married a year later. Sadly, my second husband died less than 4 years later. I have had continued support from people I have known on the old board and this one as well. I’m sorry your friend has had to join our club, too. I hope she can find connections with others who have experienced a similar loss. Hugs, Maureen
  6. Hi, hopon. My heart goes out to you! My first husband died 9 years ago and my second husband died almost 5 years ago. I was diagnosed with cancer just after the death of my second husband. It is difficult to face this on your own. I hope you find comfort in your husband’s pajamas. My husband didn’t have any 😏 but I did sleep with his pillow. Maureen
  7. It is time for another bago. After talking with some of our members, we have decided to schedule a get-together at my home on the Connecticut/Massachusetts border (just south of Springfield, MA) on Saturday, December 8th. We are hoping that the location will allow some folks a few hours north of us can make it as well. The location might make it harder on people further south...but this time the compromise is toward the north. People can arrive any time after noon. We will stay with our tradition for pot luck. Bring something to share...if we all bring chocolate, we will feast on chocolate. You should know that we already have a chocolatier in the group...so perhaps something other than chocolate would be good! We are always open to new people. Please feel free to PM me for more information. Why attend a bago? You will meet people who understand what you have or are experiencing. You can feel free to share as much or as little of your story as you want. You can laugh and cry and nobody will think anything of it. You can make new friends. And you can eat. I hope to see you all! Maureen
  8. Wheelerswife

    Dating a widowed man

    I met my second husband when I was 6 months out. He was only 2 months out. We married a year later. Our relationship was wonderful. Unfortunately, he died just under 4 years after we met. It has been almost 5 years since he died and I am just now looking into dating again. Readiness depends on on many factors. Meet, talk, see where things go! Best wishes! Maureen
  9. Wheelerswife

    Really - forever mail?

    Hi, Mark, Long time no see. I still get mail addressed to my second husband. He also died in 2014. I have a credit card that was once jointly owned with my first husband. I don't know how many times I have let them know that the account should not contain his name...yet today, I get an email for him on his birthday month...on MY email account. UGH. He has been gone 9 years. I hope you make the next bago...we can lament this together. Maureen
  10. Wheelerswife

    Dreams...

    I woke up this morning in a mini panic. I realize I was coming out of a dream where I was lost in a big and confusing hospital and I was trying to find my second husband. I had never been in a big hospital with him. I don’t know where this came from, but it was so unsettling! If I keep looking, can I just find him? Sigh. Maureen
  11. Wheelerswife

    I have a new job!!

    Congratulations! I know how hard the job search can be. I hope you find satisfaction i your new position...once they make sure you aren't a criminal! Maureen
  12. Wheelerswife

    Are there any normal men on dating sites?

    I have recently started looking at online dating. I met one man a couple of weeks ago. He was still married and living with his wife, although they had agreed that they didn’t want to be married anymore. Let’s just say he wasn’t very self-aware. He wasn’t available on so many levels. I nicely told him this...and through our conversation, I believe he came to understand. He needs friends and a lawyer, not a date! Maureen
  13. Wheelerswife

    Picking up the pieces

    It is all hard. Time does have a way with easing the intensity of pain. You will likely have waves when it feels harder and periods in between when you feel like you can get through this and keep going forward. In many ways, there really isn’t much choice. Life goes on and somehow, we have to find what it takes to get on the train and get carried along until we find enough reserves of our own to make our own path. Hugs to you, Maureen
  14. Wheelerswife

    It’s been five years

    I think that a lot of us are hoping to find someone new. Others feel as though they don't want someone new in their lives. I have just recently dipped my toe in the pool of online dating. The first guy I met was still married...and still living with his wife. Thanks for the transparency....NOT!
  15. Wheelerswife

    New Relationships....Post a Pic

    Love every bit of this, Rob! Maureen

About Wheelerswife

Hey folks.  This website and its predecessor have been lifelines for me on this widow journey.  I found YWBB about a month after my first husband died.  The day my second husband died, I was surrounded by some people I met just 2 weeks later at a local Widowbago (as well as some others I met after that time).  I hope that people will take advantage of the possibilities for connections with others who can understand the heartache of losing a spouse/partner and others who have learned to keep living with their broken and healing hearts.  I have had the privilege of meeting several people from this site and I have developed virtual friendships with a few others as well.  I may never get to meet the people I have come to care about who live in other countries, but they are still a part of my support system.  I live in the US, but have met wids when I traveled to Canada and Australia (hey - when you go that distance, why not?) as well as across the US. 

Find someone whose post resonates with you and take a small risk with a PM.  You never know - you might find a friend. 

 

Hugs to all of you,

 

Maureen

Personal Information

  • Date Widowed
    09/21/2009
  • Name of Spouse
    DH1 - Barry, DH2 - John
  • Date Widowed
    9/22/2009 1/11/2014
  • Cause of death
    DH1- Respiratory Failure DH2- Cardiac Arrhythmia
  • Spouse's Age
    5356


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