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StillWidowed

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  1. StillWidowed

    Dating

    Hang on a minute Mike. Stephen has not experienced the loss of a partner. He was simply dating a widow and looking for advice. This forum is for us. The widows and widowers of partners, common law spouses, gay and lesbian couples, etc. We don't have many forums unique to our situation, especially when loss happens so young. I'm with faye on this one.
  2. StillWidowed

    Thanks to my fellow wids

    I'm glad you're doing better tybec. I remember coming out of my first post widow relationship. I completely lost myself in that relationship like you. It's hard to navigate this new life with a heart that's been broken over the one we loved so much. (((Hugs)))
  3. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Tybec, that's a good plan. I do the same at times. Take breaks for awhile. I have a busy life, so sometimes it's nice not to have to feel obligated to do the whole chit chat and meet thing.
  4. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Virgo, I go thru those phases. Depends on how much energy I have. I went out with a guy that is 12 years younger than me on Saturday night. Zzzzzzzzz couldn't get out of the restaurant fast enough. There was a guy next to us and we chatted some about the Titans Ravens game. Here he's on the dating site, messaged me the next day, and asked me out. Pretty funny, but not my type. I date now just for something to do
  5. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    "No" or "I'm not interested" with those kinds of guys, to them, means try harder.
  6. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    That's awesome Virgo. And I knew two weeks after I met DH, and so did he. But there was no push to jump in the sack right away. I knew he was genuinely interested in me. It's a gut thing, and I'm going to listen to it. Oh, and he texted me again, with no change on his part. Just taking my temperature to see if I'd changed my mind and was panicking because he'd disappeared. I made it very clear, I had not!
  7. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    I know it was a deliberate deception on his part. My mistake that I left this out.......everything centered around sex. Conversations in person, via text, telephone. All sex. He pushed the subject constantly. It was very clear after a week what he was crazy about and it wasn't me. It was what I could offer him from the waist down.
  8. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Ok, so I met a guy and we went out a few times (different guy from above post). He came on strong. Talked about how he was head over heels crazy about me. I'm so beautiful and sexy and on and on and on. Couldn't believe his luck...blah blah blah. Of course this lady ain't no dummy. I knew these were potential red flags. Talked about how amazing sex would be with me.....more blah blah blah. Mind you we had known each other a total of ......10 days! So I had to have the talk and let him know I was in no way moving at the same lightning speed that he was. I like to take my time and get to know a person. Well.....you can guess, I'm sure. Slowly I heard from him less and less until he sent me the text that he was going to back off. Things going on in his life right now, he understood if I moved on without him.....more blah blah blah. It was actually comical. I responded with no worries, we've known each other less than 2 weeks and of course I'm going to date others. So, I happened to come across an article about dating, and it mentioned a word called "mosting". It's a sub category of ghosting...LOL. It's when the guy comes on really strong right out of the gate with the end goal of getting sex and then disappearing. I was cracking up. Does this generation really need to name things that have been happening from the beginning of time? The timing was impeccable. Dating = thick skin!
  9. StillWidowed

    Missing my sidekick

    I'm so sorry for the loss of your lovely husband and the pain you're experiencing. I remembering thinking.....how can I possibly be in all this pain and still be alive. I was so upset that everyone else's live went on when my world had come to a screeching halt. My sister was very empathetic and I loved her for that, but she still didn't understand that when she went home, her family was still in tact while mine had a huge gaping hole. It's a loneliness and a pain only others that have walked in our shoes can understand. Be gentle with yourself and feel what you feel. And keep coming here. We get it. We understand. And we're here to listen, comfort and encourage you when you need it.
  10. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    I have been making a conscience effort to accept dates and meet instead of being lazy about it all (I mentioned in a post way back that I'm kind of a lazy dater). So I've had several meet and greets in the last month. They've all been very nice men, but no interest on my end. I did however meet one in particular and we have a second date tonight. We'll see how this goes. In the meantime, I'm going to continue to meet others since I've done this dance before. The one where you go out a few times with one guy, then for some reason it goes south. I have no interest in dating several men indefinitely. I would love to meet one, develop a relationship and get the hell off dating sites.
  11. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Thanks for your response ladies. It's tough out there. There ARE a lot of women that would have no problem being alone with a man on a second date, first for that fact like you stated tybec, so that makes it that much more difficult for the ladies that won't do that. I do believe that a true gentleman would understand that and would want to go the speed that makes the lady comfortable.
  12. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Hi Mike. I feel it was completely unsafe. We're pretty much still strangers. There is no way for a second date, I'm going to be alone with a man. Maybe other women are more daring, but not me. If it was a money issue on his end, then a slice of pizza would have been just fine (but gathering from the first date, that wasn't the issue). But it definitely was not that. There were subtle cues during the first date that had my radar up, but when he actually asked to see me alone for the second date, I knew my instincts were correct. I responded with sorry, I already had plans with family, to leave the door open to see if he would ask to see me again. Nope. And he knew I knew what he was up to. I hate being right about these things.
  13. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    I went out with a guy a couple weekends ago to a nice upscale restaurant. Had a nice time. Asked me out for a second date via text to either hang out at my house or his and watch a movie. Ummmmm..........................no. Next!
  14. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    Virgo, I don't feel old. In fact run circles around most my age. It's a mind thing. If a guy my age wants to go to a haunted house, I tend to think he's a case of arrested development. And as he continued the conversation.......I was right.
  15. StillWidowed

    On line dating vents and laughs......

    47 year old online guy asks me if I like haunted houses. I replied yes, when I was 10. Help me Rhonda!


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