I have been reading here for years--I posted a handful of times on the old site--but I felt moved to write on this subject!
My late husband died 8 ½ years ago--we had been together since we were both 22 years old and he died (pancreatic cancer) when we were 47. We had two sons who were 15 and 17 when he died (who are both thriving). We had a very strong, happy marriage, and had built a beautiful life together. He was an amazing man and I still love him and miss him everyday.
At about 3 ½ years after he passed away, I felt ready to start dating. I met a man on Match.com--on paper it seemed we should be a great match and I tried hard to make it work..but I constantly questioned my feelings, had so many nagging doubts, worried that I was settling, and I just never felt that spark. After more than a year together, I ended it with him and I went back on Match. I was contacted by a widower, and in trying to find a time to meet, the earliest day was on the five year anniversary of my husband’s death--otherwise we would have had to put it off for more than a week. So I decided to meet him on that anniversary day. My best friend asked if that was a good idea--I said if it works out, I’ll know that LH had a hand in it, and if it didn’t at least I wouldn’t be sitting home alone and sad.
And it did work out! We are now very happily married. One of the ways I knew, very quickly, that he was the one was that it felt so very similar to how I felt when I first met my late husband when I was 22. All along the way I have been amazed at the similarities--the overwhelming passion, the intensity of emotion, the deepening of love and intimacy--all the same that I experienced in my twenties, I am now experiencing in my 50s. I have been in love twice in my life and, for me, it has been a great source of comfort that these loves have followed the same path. I also get an enormous amount of comfort knowing that my dear LH has been a guiding force in my new life and marriage.
