momtokam Posted October 20, 2015 Author Share Posted October 20, 2015 Hello fellow online daters, hopeful daters, and funny story sharers and seekers! I have good news and bad news.... First the bad news...4 dates and done. Too bizarre to even try to explain in a public forum, so I won't go there. Good news...I will probably will be able to share funny stories again! Not sure when though. Can't handle getting back on the sites quite yet. We shall see! I do hope to be making you all laugh and smile again soon though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 Here's one. People who message, there's some back and forth, but they do nothing to advance the conversation. I'll ask questions, or make a comment, but they don't ask any questions. And I would think, okay, they're just not interested, but they keep responding. And then it feels like I'm doing all the work. Only two guys were really good at it, one the guy I liked who disappeared and the other I'm still texting and like personally but just don't feel an attraction to. One guy seems reason interesting on paper, and he messages me every couple days and asks how I'm doing but offers nothing by way of sharing interesting things about himself. And I've given him opportunities. It's completely boring. But I'm still talking to him because he keeps reaching out to me. How am I doing? Shit, that's how I'm doing! But I'm not going to share that with you because despite my attempts, we're not really getting to know each other are we? And I don't get the vibe that he's just some jerk stringing me along, I think he's probably very sweet but just not very good at this. But dude, give me something to work with! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted October 26, 2015 Author Share Posted October 26, 2015 MrsDan, Try seeing if he is up to a phone conversation maybe. Some are not good at text/written communication but maybe over a real conversation may be more personable. Worth a try at least. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted October 27, 2015 Share Posted October 27, 2015 Oh get this I did get him talking. We messaged for awhile, then he asked about my weekend, then didn't read it and hasn't logged back on. I answered his bland messages for two weeks, because I kept thinking, there has to be more to this guy, there was, and then poof! I should work for witness protection. I sure am good at making guys disappear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted October 27, 2015 Author Share Posted October 27, 2015 Oh boy! It's not you MrsDan. Don't take it personally at all. It's the on line dating "poof" phenomenon! Not sure why someone can't just say something after numerous conversations with you. Instead they choose to just magically go "poof"! Before my 4 date whirlwind disaster, I was chatting with a couple other gentlemen as well. One really wanted to meet and we had talked on the phone and had a very nice conversation. Then I met my whirlwind man. I told this other man I wanted to give this a chance and I wasn't very good at dating mutiple men at once and I explained the whole poof thing to him and that I didn't want to do that to him without an explanation. He was so appreciative and nice about it. Hoped we would have another shot at a later time. I know... I'm an odd duck in this crazy pond! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TalksToAngels Posted October 27, 2015 Share Posted October 27, 2015 The online is at times so inpersonable. If someone isn't interested it will seem to them "why bother responding. All etiquette goes out the window. If someone is interested usually it seemed, to me anyway, they would make it known. If not, it usually means time to move on. Mrs. Dan I would not take it personal. Most people, if they haven't met, or even if they have, it seems with this age of tech, don't weigh their feelings or feel need for explanations. They just vanish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Well, he did respond, so I asked him for coffee. We'll see.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 What may be needed is less social media, more social skills Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted October 28, 2015 Author Share Posted October 28, 2015 What may be needed is less social media, more social skills You would think that men in my age range (45-55) would have developed some social skills because we didn't grow up on social media. I can understand this maybe from the younger set, but I didn't expect this from my age range. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted October 29, 2015 Share Posted October 29, 2015 I just got the dickiest message:"I know I messaged you a few times, your not interested just say so". Fuck you dude, I don't owe you anything. Did you message? I don't remember, which means we were a pretty low match, or your message wasn't memorable. Also, the fact that I didn't respond IS me saying so. Then I got this gem: "Going by your profile, I deserve you more than you can ever imagine..." oh, okay I'll just take your word for it. Now, I did get a nice message from a guy saying he wanted to reply to my thoughtful message, but he's pretty busy and doesn't have time for much meaningful correspondence. So I wrote back, telling him that was the nicest thanks but no thanks I've ever gotten. And it was. I probably wouldn't have bothered. In other news, aforementioned guy and I are trying to get together for coffee. I actually suspect he is probably not wired for social media communication, but think he's worth the chance in the real world. I kept going back to his profile and thinking, I don't know I just think there's more to this guy than his messages indicate and once I got him talking, he was as interesting as I suspected. But I can't really fault him, it's such a weird place to communicate, and there are so many conflicting opinions on how to successfully navigate it. Wait this long, say this or that. All these "rules" about what you're supposed to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torn Posted October 29, 2015 Share Posted October 29, 2015 So a female "friend of family" suggested that I consider online 'dating' websites (wait for it). So I was considering doing so and had started a profile,when I got a message from a lady my age ,I said hello & we messaged back and forth for 15 minutes,when she asked me if I could receive photos & videos. She proceeded to send me a video of her as she put it 'pleasuring herself'. Holy smoke, I deleted my profile & haven't considered online dating anymore. Have I lost my mind or was that a CRAZY thing to do? Is it common that dating sites , have lunatics like I just mentioned? I'm really interested to know. Thanks to all of you men and women who posted their crazy and funny stories to this thread. I'm still laughing inside thinking of several WINNERS mentioned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted October 29, 2015 Share Posted October 29, 2015 Here's one. People who message, there's some back and forth, but they do nothing to advance the conversation. I'll ask questions, or make a comment, but they don't ask any questions. And I would think, okay, they're just not interested, but they keep responding. And then it feels like I'm doing all the work. Only two guys were really good at it, one the guy I liked who disappeared and the other I'm still texting and like personally but just don't feel an attraction to. One guy seems reason interesting on paper, and he messages me every couple days and asks how I'm doing but offers nothing by way of sharing interesting things about himself. And I've given him opportunities. It's completely boring. But I'm still talking to him because he keeps reaching out to me. How am I doing? Shit, that's how I'm doing! But I'm not going to share that with you because despite my attempts, we're not really getting to know each other are we? And I don't get the vibe that he's just some jerk stringing me along, I think he's probably very sweet but just not very good at this. But dude, give me something to work with! I haven't ventured into online dating, but this is how I feel about the guy I'm dating. We've been out three times. He's really sweet, admittedly shy, and a lot of fun. I just wish I didn't feel like I was initiating all contact and conversation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobFTC Posted October 29, 2015 Share Posted October 29, 2015 Torn, that pleasuring woman was probably the fictional creation of some guy in an overseas boiler room whose goal was to extract money from your wallet. That happens, and has nothing to do with online dating except for camping out on that particular communications mechanism. You can get used to "smelling" them rapidly. What dating site was that? On match.com, they go 'poof' as their fraudulent credit card payments fail or as they are flagged and deleted. Take care, Rob T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted October 30, 2015 Share Posted October 30, 2015 I had as many dates from Craig's List as I did conventional dating sites. Actually without a profile to fill out, I think it was easier to tell the fakes from the legitimate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torn Posted October 30, 2015 Share Posted October 30, 2015 Ya know that would make great sence Rob, the crazy thing is this person 'not a lady' I have seen around my area, she actually live 5 minutes from my home, I know this because she told me her street name & I realized that's why she looks familiar,I've seen her and her mom shopping. I'm telling ya man, NO WOMAN I've ever dated would've shared a video like that. I'm no saint or a prude,but I really think some people do crazier things than I had imagined. Before the porno clip she text me, and honestly I'm a very lonely person, I miss talking to a female my age & don't think I'd consider anything serious anyhow,it's just plainly put I'm 42 and have had a steady long-term relationship that was a love based relationship since I was 13. So I miss lil things like the way a lady paints her nails & considers new hair styles purely put the girlie part of a woman. Maybe one day but not on "Plenty of fish" dating website. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meema Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 Every once in a while I scroll through my filtered messages on OKCupid. I found this one tonight: "Look, you owe me 99 cents because your profile melted my heart like a snickers bar in a pocket on a hot summer's day." Is that ridiculous or just depressing? I can't decide. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeanGenie Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 Meema, Not quite sure...but it definitely made me laugh!!! So thanks for sharing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimiRed Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 What in the world did people do before all these "dating sites" were available via technology? I'm not venturing onto dating sites...there may be "real" honest people on there, but I'm not in the mood to be "fishing" through a lot of lunatics to find one. I do enjoy reading some of your classic adventures though, some are just plain ridiculously funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bear Tomás Posted October 31, 2015 Share Posted October 31, 2015 What in the world did people do before all these "dating sites" were available via technology? I'm not venturing onto dating sites...there may be "real" honest people on there, but I'm not in the mood to be "fishing" through a lot of lunatics to find one. I do enjoy reading some of your classic adventures though, some are just plain ridiculously funny! Dated local gals/guys, friend of friends, other church members, etc. The internet is a blessing and a curse. Too many choices make people confused, imho. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobFTC Posted November 5, 2015 Share Posted November 5, 2015 POF seems really nutty right now - all of a sudden, the Raging Grannies seem to be after me. I got a number of messages last week from a woman in Denver who's ten years older and retired; I was polite and explained that the distance would not work for me, and best of luck. She appears to have forgotten she contacted me, and tried again this week with the same initial approach. Yesterday, I got a message from someone 18 years older, also a bit too far away. And my last nine profile views have included women 14, 11, 11 and 23 years older. This is not quite the demographic I would like to excite! I try not to buy into the norm of older guy/younger women, but I'm 54 and am starting to feel weird looking at women 45 or younger, and these gaps aren't more comfortable. Do I look that old? (Don't answer that!) Take care, Rob T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted November 5, 2015 Author Share Posted November 5, 2015 Rob, you young stud you! POF was the same here for me this time. I completely deleted my account there because it was just much older in age or in looks contacting me. It was much different 2 years ago and I actually met my one relationship on there then. I'm not really going on the other 2 sites right now, but recently on OKC it was only men far away in the US or UK contacting me. Scammers? Maybe. Who knows, too far for me so it doesn't matter. My friend is trying to convince me to try Tinder. She is insisting it's not a hook up site for my age group and has friends in relationships from Tinder. I can only imagine the stories I could share from that experience! Right now I'm just laying low for a bit. My minimal texter from a few weeks back is still sending texts like "Hey". We did meet up last weekend for coffee a second time. But still getting minimal contact after that. He is very busy, but a nice guy and does lots of talking in person. I'm still trying to figure him out, but it's probably the speed I need right now after my last crazy whirlwind. Tracey, there are nice ones on the sites, look at all of us on there.😊 You need to be in the right frame of mind to weed through it though. Not always an easy task. Bear, yes, the too many choices confuse people and keep many from continuing conversations. Someone better comes along and they go "poof" on you. What happened to giving someone a chance first? I'm in the "whatever" mood right now with all this stuff! Keep sharing your stories everyone! We all need a good chuckle as often as possible! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 Well, I met with him. Not quite what I expected, but very, very sweet. Like really really sweet. Maybe I'm an idiot, but it seems genuine. And while his demeanor isn't the type I'm normally attracted to, I find his profession totally hot . So we'll see. Quite frankly, I could use sweetness at this point in my life. But this is a vent post, so I'll add that I got the nastiest post from is other guy about all the things he would do to me. Classy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrskro Posted November 6, 2015 Share Posted November 6, 2015 Hi how are you today sexy? ( I have a pic of a sunset up) I'm good....we've actually met I'm Dave...what's your name? Still the same .... but last time you were Ben.. What is wrong with people? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted November 6, 2015 Author Share Posted November 6, 2015 Hi how are you today sexy? ( I have a pic of a sunset up) I'm good....we've actually met I'm Dave...what's your name? Still the same .... but last time you were Ben.. What is wrong with people? Hahahaha!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted November 6, 2015 Author Share Posted November 6, 2015 Well, I met with him. Not quite what I expected, but very, very sweet. Like really really sweet. Maybe I'm an idiot, but it seems genuine. And while his demeanor isn't the type I'm normally attracted to, I find his profession totally hot . So we'll see. Quite frankly, I could use sweetness at this point in my life. But this is a vent post, so I'll add that I got the nastiest post from is other guy about all the things he would do to me. Classy. Sweetness is very good! Classy for sure! I guess they feel a computer screen allows for this kind of communication? Would they say those things if they met out in person somewhere? I think not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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