The ring...

[itsjustme]

Hi Everyone,

  I took my ring off a few weeks ago. It's been a year since my husband passed away. I really miss wearing my ring but it doesn't feel like it belongs on my left hand anymore. I'm thinking of getting it sized for my right hand but I'm worried that it will wreck my ring, or that it won't feel right on my right hand either, and then I'll have just messed it up. Has anyone here gotten their  ring sized? How did/does it feel/look now?

[linda5]

I love my wedding rings, for the beauty they possess, and for the reminder of the beautiful life I shared with my husband.  I did, at 2 years, have it resized to my right hand.  I will never take it completely off.

[LostMyCharles]

I sent our wedding bands to a jeweler to meld together into a double infinity pendant; I'm attaching a picture of the inspiration (hope it works!!). I'm also having our daughter's birthstone placed in the middle of the two loops.  I plan on wearing the necklace daily.

[sojourner]

Sometimes I wear mine just as it is, on my left hand, because it simply feels natural. Sometimes I wear it so I can "pass" as just a regular married person. Sometimes I wear it as an homage to my life as a wife. Sometimes as a denial of my status as a widow. And sometimes I leave it at home, as I work through this widda-thing.

 

At some point, I think I want to re-size it wear on my right hand, when I've more or less finished processing and reconciled my past and my present, to whatever degree that's possible. But for whatever reason, at this point anyway, I don't want to alter it and I don't want to put it away, either.  Still working through it, I guess.

[Fuchsia]

Mine is a tattoo. It's never coming off.  If I ever remarry the new man can have my right hand.  The left will always belong to Rob.  I knew he was dying when we married last year.  We had been together 9 years already.  I knew what it meant when I got the ring tattooed.

[MrsT85]

I resized mine and switched it to my right hand at a few months out.  And that's where I've worn it daily for over two years now.  I actually wasn't intending to do it so soon, but after reading a post on the old board about someone else switching it to their right hand I wanted to try it myself (since I have no intention of ever ceasing to wear it completely) and got it stuck because my right hand is slightly larger than my left.  I had to go (panicking and in tears) to an immediate care center and get it cut off.  I felt stupid and pitiful for doing such a moronic thing and I was terrified that I had ruined my ring.

 

I was able to have it repaired and resized and today you can't even tell that it took two nurses and a bone saw to pry it off my finger back in mid 2013.  So while I clearly can't speak to whether or not it will feel right to you to switch it to your right hand, I can tell you that resizing it shouldn't damage it or ruin it.

[TheNewNormal]

I continued wearing my ring for the first 3 month. I then decided to make a replica in sterling silver with her fingerprint on the inside and I wear it on my right hand. My original gold one is now in my SDB with both her rings.

[MrsMisterman]

Sojourner- your words were beautiful and all encompassing of my feelings. Thank you.

 

At more than three years out, I still wear my rings on my left hand out in public most days. I feel amiss without them. Just like when I forget to put on my watch. Something's missing and doesn't feel right. But I do go without them, just like sometimes I go without a watch - on purpose or by forgetfulness.

 

I have never wore any jewelry, including my wedding rings, at home or in private settings. The first thing I have always done when home for the day is take off all my jewelry.

 

I chalk it up to being a widow thing that will resolve on its own.  One way or another.