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A Letter to My Kenneth


lcoxwell
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On this last night, before my wedding, I decided I needed to spend just a little time acknowledging Kenneth. So, I wrote this on his Facebook wall. I thought I would share it here, too:

 

Tomorrow, I will fulfill the promise I made to you, when you asked me to go out and find love again, and you made me promise I would not spend my life alone. I know how important it was to you, for those around you to honor the promises they made; so I know, you would be happy for me. Thank you for that gift to me, for giving me permission to grieve, but not to spend my life wallowing in it. Thank you for giving me permission to move forward in life, after you were gone. Other than loving me, that has been the greatest gift you have ever given to me.

 

If not for your stubborn insistence that I find myself another man, or your refusal to accept anything less than my promise to you, that I would not spend the rest of my life alone; I don't know if I would have had the strength or courage to open my heart to anyone else. If not for you, I would not have found love again. And I would not be starting a new life with a new husband tomorrow. He's everything you told me you wanted me to find in a new man. I think you would be happy about that, too.

 

Please know, that there will always be a place in my heart that belongs to you. You gave me a good life, Kenneth, and you loved me until your dying breath. In return my heart is big enough to always love you, without taking anything away from the man I will be marrying tomorrow.

 

Rest easy and know that you and God have left me in good hands. I love you!

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