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I miss being in love


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You know.. With someone who is alive. The hardest thing is being in love with someone who is dead.  I still for feel a need to be faithful to my husband.  Especially now.  I feel like he is constantly watching me, which breaks my heart because I know how much it would break his heart to see me like this and then I cry because I know he'd be crying.  Its a vicious cycle. I just miss him. I love him.

 

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  • 2 months later...

He would want you to be happy. I think we all know that even if we didn't get to hear them say those words to us. Phil told me at his lowest point in treatment "you'll make some lucky guy an amazing wife. " I said, "I already do." I wasn't ready to hear that then, but now I see it as a gift. He was an amazing man. It's still hard for me to imagine loving and being loved by a guy as amazing as Phil.

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