TornApart Posted October 20, 2017 Share Posted October 20, 2017 Today would have been our 10th wedding anniversary. We got in 5 anniversaries before he died.  No one remembered. Not bitter. Just wanted to acknowledge it somewhere. Not a FB post where everyone reacts with 😢. Just somewhere where the people that read it get it. I'm ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheelerswife Posted October 20, 2017 Share Posted October 20, 2017 Hugs! Â Maureen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sojourner Posted October 20, 2017 Share Posted October 20, 2017 I completely get it. The birthdays, anniversaries and other special days that maybe only I remember... and even if they did remember, virtually no one in my daily life can know what it's like through widowed eyes and hearts. (And at times I think it's better to hear nothing than listening to minimizing platitudes from some of them.) Â Usually I get myself a vase of flowers to honor the memory and the significance of the day. It's just my way of expressing that these days do matter. Â Peace to you today! Â Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJF Posted October 20, 2017 Share Posted October 20, 2017 I get it too. Nobody acknowledges our anniversary anymore (it's been 6 1/2 years). Not sure if they truly don't remember or just think I should be "over it" by now. Hugs to you on this day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted October 20, 2017 Share Posted October 20, 2017 I get it too. I just don't understand but have come to learn "it is what it is" Hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Euf Posted October 21, 2017 Share Posted October 21, 2017 Â Â Yes, being bitter doesn't help but it's hard to know what does. Â I hope that it helps to have us know and understand what you are saying. Â (((hugs))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TornApart Posted October 21, 2017 Author Share Posted October 21, 2017 Thanks all. It does help to be able to reach out on this forum. You all know how hard it is to keep going and wear 'the face' in public when it is taking all your strength just to get out of bed. You are right - most people assume we are 'over it' by a certain point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sojourner Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 Yeah, "the face"... that mask, that shield... and I'm not always sure whom I'm protecting more. Myself from unwelcome comments, or them in their innocence and in that naivete of those whose domain is still the land of togetherness, birthdays, anniversary celebrations...? Â Hard to blame them; I used to live in that neighborhood myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunny Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 The thing about wedding anniversaries is, after that first year, really only you and your spouse remember it. (Maybe your parents/in-laws/children might). That's the delight when you're married- it's a day of celebration for just two; unlike a birthday, that's for one, or a holiday that's for many. It's unique that way. And, while you're married, it's oh so lovely and fabulous to have this special, intimate celebration for two. Then they're gone and for the first time you actually notice it truly is a holiday of two that no one else really pays much attention to unless you tell them. And celebrating a holiday for two when you are now one can feel pretty darn lonely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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