My own experience...

[Sillyjerkycat]

Hello. I’m new to this site and I found it when I realized that this was my new world. I’m so glad that it’s here for us. It has had a profound effect on me and I realized that I’m not alone. I’m a 51 widow and my husband was 53 when he unexpectedly had a cardiac arrest out of nowhere. I have a cousin, that is a nurse, and she told me that anyone can have a cardiac arrest, for a multiple of reasons out of nowhere, and the hospital never figured out why. Yes, he had heart problems, but they were well managed. And then on September 10^th it happened. He had a “brain injury” which really translates to brain damage. So for the next three months I was with him every day. The first months I had hope that I could help him come home and live some sort of life, but then it became apparent that after 22 year marriage it was over. He told me in one of his lucid moments “I’m one of the crazy people and I don’t want of one of the crazy people” and I understood that meant he did not want to live this way. At that point he was always crying or raging at the brain rehab. The hospital reached out to me and explained that he would always be this way forever, so the kindest thing I could do was put into the hospice. It was awful watching your love die just a little bit more every day.

I just want you to know grief is different for all of us, but after watching my husband transition from normal guy to the mess that it ended up to be, I’m glad he’s free. While I grieve, it’s different every day. It gets a little be less painful. I know he’s happy and has moved on to a better place. He shows up with silly things in the house to let me know he’s there. They never leave you.

[Darren77]

Www.gonetoosoonanna.com 

[Sillyjerkycat]

Sorry @Darren77, can't see your link for your Anna. Maybe you could share your experience with us. I find talking about it with with people who have actually been through it can be very cathartic and helps all of us realize that we're not alone while all the other people around us just don't get it. Thanks for posting and I wish you peace for the new year.