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Bluebird

Sad Loss Of WifeLess

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Some on this board will know of WifeLess, an ardent supporter and contributor to this board and the prior board it replaced. I know him as my husband, and the man who restored my ability to love and enjoy life after the loss of my first husband back in 2010.

 

Sadly I share here that he passed away from pancreatic cancer less than a week ago.

 

It seems fitting that I mark the solemn occassion here, and to do so, I'd like to share what I wrote as I announced his passing to our friends and family [edited here to protect private details].

 

WifeLess - may you rest in peace and free from the horror of your cancer. Until we meet again my love, Bluebird.

 

A great man left our company today.

He would smile wryly at the description “Great Man”, thinking that perhaps we had lost our minds.

But we have not.

We see and feel the mark he has left. 

In the field of mathematics, his theorem and proof created a bridge across two great ideas struggling to make sense relative to each other.

As a teacher - inspiring and guiding students through their coursework by teaching in a way they enjoyed. He thought of it as putting on a show, not simply teaching, and he made the material come to life.
 
Loving and caring son, brother, brother in-law and uncle. Adept in the family way of not having to say everything, yet knowing that all that is important was said and/or felt.

Loyal and loving husband to Beverly, aiding her through psychiatric illness, standing by her side during hospitalizations and treatments, working all the while and eventually co-creating their beautiful home.

”WifeLess” to many in the widowed community. A sage contributor and a friend to many on the bulletin board that we called home for a while. Offering insight to those who were suffering and understanding just the right thing to write or say to offer comfort and hope. Penning “Unique and Devastating Loss”  - to help the widowed explain to their family and friends the breadth and depth of loss when one loses their life partner. 

Somehow, after experiencing devastating loss “WifeLess & Bluebird”came together and fell in love. And what a love it is. Kindred spirits drawn together forever. Our love spilling over to a shared love of my children and grandchild. While never a biological parent or grandparent, WifeLess became much loved by his new extended family without hesitation. The bond of love spreading further and further with the adoption of each other’s friends - my friends, your friends, now our friends. 

“In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York, and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep, the tears would all go to the same place, and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down, and you could know if New York is in heavy boots.” 
― Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

It goes without saying that WifeLess is a great man, loved by many and assuredly to be missed by all. Together, we will make a reservoir of tears as we mourn his loss with heavy boots. Indeed, the weatherman will report that the Resevoir of Tears has burst its banks and caused floods far and wide. 

Farewell WifeLess, the light of your life will live on brightly in each person whose life you have touched. I do not know how I will go on, but I will try to shine a light as bright as yours my love.
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Love and hugs to you, Bluebird.  Wifeless was such a kind and humble man and his word have reached so many of our young widowed brothers and sisters. 

Maureen

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Bluebird, you have been on my heart and mind since I heard the devastating news.  Fittingly, RemysWife bumped the beautiful Unique and Devastating Loss post on the same day.  Wifeless will never know his true impact on so many of us in this community.  What beautiful words you wrote for your beloved.  Your love was undeniable proof that, out of the greatest sadness, love and light can still prevail. 

 

You know the adages...you spoke them yourself to so many with kindness and wisdom.  Be gentle with yourself.  The world is a lesser place without Wifeless.  Sending all the love and hugs in the world. 

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Ugh, so sorry to hear this Bluebird. :(

 

Prayers for you, Wifeless and both of your families.

 

Mike

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Bluebird, I'm so sorry for your loss. Wifeless will be missed my many. Please accept my sincere condolences.

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Another Unique and Devastating Loss, indeed...

My heart goes out to you Bluebird, and to all who loved this man. 

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I am so sorry for your loss.  You're in my thoughts.

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Im so so sorry for your loss...I read much of your journey on the prior board and both of your supportive comments on this board. Such a beautiful post and tribute to him....Life really is not fair sometimes.....

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I'm so very sorry to hear of his passing. Altho I never met him, I feel as though I've known him for many years. He was was huge part of the old web site, and this one as well.

God bless you, friend.

~Catnip

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Sorry...no words...Wifeless already said most of them and I always appreciated reading them. You and he are constantly in my thoughts these days.

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Bluebird - I am so very sorry for your loss.  You both have contributed so much wisdom on this board thru the years and helped so many.  You and your family are in my prayers.

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