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Your new mate has exs and sometimes communicates?


tybec
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Much to think about. Sudnlysngl, I do need to remind myself the positives versus negatives. I do vent here a lot. 

I love this guy.  We are SO good together, but yes, it is not all about just us. There are 3 kids involved, an ex wife, court, etc.  I thought I could handle it all well and I guess it is not so.

 

Testified Friday at court. Went well. Ex wife's attorney asked about  staying at his house, my house, with the kids, without.  YEAH.  Asked if we were getting married.  The judge is conservative Church of Christ elder. So, if you think the law is straight forward, deal with small town court.

Now I wait to see how it goes.  He expects more time which is the whole reason he moved here. He had 50/50 prior to the oldest going to school and the judge in his state where the divorce occurred said he had to move if he wanted more time as the judge could not force the mother and children back to his state. 

 

Mrs.Dan,  the geography was the issue.  A 4 hour commute to his children he did have 50/50 with was not possible anymore. The judge advised to move. His gf in that state had her kids with their dad there, and her family. So she could not move with her kids. He chose his children over her. She chose her children over him. They were all under 8 years old, his were 5 and 3.  I don't blame him for ending the relationship.  I admired he chose his kids needs versus his at this point in his life.  I would have also.  I get it. 

 

Thanks for the input.  I can deal with reality.  I have been through far worse than this. AND he knows I will not stick around if it is only about his kids. I have sent him too many articles on blending families successfully.  I have the support but needed the sounding board which you provided. Eyes wide open.  

 

PS.  His other witnesses, 5 total, all told him I was a keeper.  I don't know what we discussed while waiting to testify that they came to that conclusion, but he told me that.  BUT I  know that 😉

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