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Widowed 5-9-19

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My name is Gemma and I recently lost my husband, who was 38. We had been together for almost 16 years and married for a little over 10. I am 35 and can not even believe that I am having to deal with this.  I dont know what steps to take to move forward. Any tips, tricks, or hints? 

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Hello Gemma, 


Welcome to Widda and to the club that no one wants to join. This place is full of tips, and ideas, but ultimately everyone is different. You will surely find someone here you can relate to, perhaps on the same timeline as you, perhaps a little further along. For now, just know you are not alone, and that you will wake up everyday and move forward in some way. Sometimes it will be a great victory that you could take a shower and walk to the mailbox. Just be kind to yourself, try to stay hydrated and if someone wants to help you, try to let them. 



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Hello Gemma,


As Hachi said, welcome to a club that no one wants to join. Let me give you some hugs, as I am sure you need them. Ten days is not a very long time and I am sure you are still in shock. I know I still feel that way sometimes.


Today was three months for me, My biggest tip (at least for me) is to stay busy. I like to sew, however, my concentration was, let's just say not my best, so I did a LOT of charity work, just to keep my hands busy. I still cry a lot, however, because of coming to this website all the time, I find that it is normal and I don't feel like I am being weird.


And yes, everything, no matter how little it seems, that you can do will be a victory. In the beginning (that first month), I tried to leave the house every day...but I gave myself permission that if I got half way somewhere and couldn't do it, I could always come home. I made it to somewhere most of the time. Anyway it helped me to connect with someone else at least once a day.


Remember, to take care of yourself, and to stay hydrated.

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Hi Gemma,

 I am sorry you are here. I lost my husband almost two months ago. He was 41. I'm still very much trying to navigate through this nightmare. I get up and get outside and walk and read alot on this forum. All of those seem to help. 

And like what was said, you are not alone. Just knowing that has helped me through this darkness. 

Hugs, hugs, and more hugs!

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