babymoose

Thank you so much to Lewis for getting this back up and running!

I'm happy to say I finally made it to the "Beyond Active Grieving" forum, someplace I never thought I'd see after he passed in 2013.  But I keep meeting new club members (sigh), and I'm so glad to be able to send them here again.

And I"m happy to be able to browse the old YWBB again.  How cool.

So glad to hear you've been given that closure.

"Better" takes a long, long time.  You know how they say grief comes in waves?  It does, and sometimes you get "sneaker waves."  Sneaker waves are a real phenomenon in the ocean, where a wave comes along out of nowhere that's much bigger than all the ones before and after it.  It bowls you over when you aren't looking.

Eventually, the waves start to get smaller and further apart, but even now I still get bowled over by the occasional sneaker wave.

Be gentle with yourself and take lots of time to rest.  This is a long and hard journey.

Julia,

At 5 years out (almost to the day), I don't drop by here often any more, but felt compelled to visit tonight and saw your post.

I also lost my husband to cardiac arrest, also in Colorado, also a common law marriage, a month or so after his mother had a stroke.  I am so very sorry for all you are going through right now.

Sending you much love and a hug.  And if I were still in Colorado I would take you to coffee and give you that hug in person and listen to you tell me about how amazing Chris was (and hopefully somewhere still is).

I was reading through old posts and thought I'd chime in with the dictionary definition of widow from Webster's:

"1 a : a woman who has lost her spouse OR PARTNER [emphasis mine] by death and usually has not remarried"

I don't think it gets any more straightforward than that.

And anyway, as others have so eloquently stated, this is a matter of the heart. 

Welcome, Tammy.

So sorry you had to join this horrible club.  I hope you are taking good care of yourself, and giving yourself a lot of space and time to just be.

Hang on to those dreams of both of them.  It's sweet that you are having them, and I think they're letting you know they're okay, somewhere.

((hugs))

Headed your way, and DJ has this playing:

Cardboard ship is on its way to Boston!  We even saved some bubbly for you.  :-*

Aw, Rob, was just poking through older posts and saw this.

I'm sad to hear it ended, and I thank you for all the effort (and $$) you put into it.  It meant a lot to me when I was there and needed it.

I would've had nobody to celebrate my 40th birthday with were it not for you!  <3

<3<3<3 That makes my heart happy.  Much love to you, and happy new year!

The rest of you feel free to eat the lasagna.  More drinks in the fridge.  I don't know if I'll make it to midnight...

True, I'm glad there's not a line up.  Then again, I hope someone is holding those wids tight tonight somewhere else.

I'm sorry today was hard.  And I'm glad you caught the ship.  'Cause see, YOU really started the thread.  Maybe you needed to be reminded of your own awesomeness. 

I think everyone else on board got drunk and passed out already.  Leaves more wine for us.  I'm thinking I could eat a piece of lasagna right about now, too...  *stuffs face*

Ooh, fancy silver number would have fit well with the tin foil.

And cheap red wine will sounds good to me!

I hope you brought a lot of duct tape. 

Hot damn, it's you!  The original rocket ship queen! 

I will never forget that ride, and can never thank you enough for it. <3 <3 <3

I'm sad that it vanished with the YWBB, but hell, we'll make a new one.  And seeing as I'm just a couple hundred miles from you in WA state, the rocket ship will soon be there!

Okay, I am breaking out the bean dip and popping open a cold one.

I'll be here if you need me, kickin' back with the dog and the cat and makin' more stuff out of tin foil.

Wait, this one's better!

Next stop, Ladybug's house!  A tiara for you, my dear:

Got any food, beverage, or music requests?

(And M, I hope the same for you!)

Miss you too, Maureen!

So I made you a hat:

Darned if you aren't all the way across the country.  But wait, I have a rocket ship!!!

Also, no new year would be complete without this:

First stop, Pittsburgh!  And away we go!

I'll bring some pumpkin pie and cider.

No energy required!  I made you one too:

Too much?

Four years ago I was facing my first new year without him and was two months into membership in this horrible club.

I've never posted on this forum, but the predecessor to this board, the ywbb, saved my life on more than one occasion.  That New Year's was one.

Another lovely wid started a cardboard rocket ship thread, and off we went, visiting lots of places, eating lots of yummy things, playing lots of music, drinking lots of alcohol, and wearing ridiculous outfits, such as the tin foil cocktail dress.  It somehow made it all more bearable, and made me feel not as alone.

I thought about that last night, and realized...

NOW THE ROCKET MUST FLY AGAIN!  HOP ON!  WHERE TO FIRST?