rmdee67

Wheelerswife:  Thank you for your kind words and advice.  I have been going to 2 mental health professionals--my long term therapist and one who specializes in processing trauma.  The anxiety is a challenge.  I know intellectually I starving for intimacy and willing to accept crumbs but I can't seem to come down emotionally from this need.  What's killing me is that I've known this man for over 10 years, he knows how I am, I know he's a worrier, and he hasn't had the courage or decency to shoot me a short note to say I'm sorry I haven't called you back and I'm trying to find the right time get back to you or whatever.  He could have done that for my birthday.  I expect people to behave the way I would and that's a lifelong struggle for me.  I can't accept people for who they are.  I want them to live up to a potential.  I'm so saddened by this turn of events. 

Hi!  This is my first post.  I lost my husband Feb. 10, 2015--I also learned he was unfaithful 2 months b4 he died. 2 weeks after he died I learned he had hidden mental and addictive issues.  I couldn't believe it, but mental health professionals have suggested he was a sociopath.  Well, I found myself attracted to a man I worked with for over 10 years.  I've professed my feelings for him in Nov when he told me he was not ready for a relationship and tried to kiss him on Saturday and was rebuffed and he told me he met someone in 2014 whom he sees every 2-3 months (I know--I sure know how to pick them).  I'm obsessing over him and myself and my choices and inability to focus on what matters most right now: Me and my 3 daughters. I can't focus at work.  What can I do about this craziness?