MrsK

Oh no! I was trying to pick something so crazy and it wasn't even close to your reality. I guess I am luckier with online dating than I thought.

Meeting for coffee is less scary to me than handing out my phone number. When you meet for coffee, it's in public and there is plenty of help available if my date seems dangerous in person. So far, I've been lucky in that my dates have turned out to be as safe in person as they seemed online. I don't give out more than my first name before I've met a person face to face. It seems too dangerous to me because with either piece of information, you can get back to my address with very little work. I try to set up a meeting in person after a few (three or four) good email exchanges because most of the time when I meet men in person, there's no spark. I like making new friends but that's not why I signed up on OKCupid and I want to know if I have to go back to searching the postings and sending out messages. I've sent out far more messages than have been returned, despite being female and not hideous. I've also gotten truckloads of messages that are nothing more than "Hey, cute smile." or "Ur hot" which I don't count as real messages. Particularly when they come from Australia or South Africa. Sometimes what happens on a dating site isn't a reflection of you, it's the other people out there. They might have just started up with someone else or gotten sick or had their office cut off access to the site or a million other reasons. All you can do is keep trying. Unless you are sending out first messages that say something like "Nice hair, let's meet in person so I can smell it." which I am pretty sure you aren't! That kind of message would scare off most women, I think.

So happy to see this thread here! This is one of many pre-wedding smooches. He was such a wonderful man.