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pcsclan

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  1. I am not even sure where to begin. I lost my husband of 34 years to an accidental overdose. He was with my brother at the time so they left this world together. I have not even really acknowledged my brothers death as I was not surprised by it and knew it was only a matter of time. My husband on the other hand was a complete shock. He had been struggling with addiction for years now due to an accident. We had separated for the first time ever after I had started attending Naranon meetings. He was trying so hard towards the end to beat it and get his life back on track. The guilt and pain of his passing is some days almost to much to bear. All the questions, the what ifs.My heart is broken and I feel like I don't fit in with most widows who lost their loved ones to illness. Even though he had an illness, addiction it is different. There are no grief groups at least none that I can find for spouses who lost a spouse to addiction. I have yet to fine a therapist who actually specialies in this topic. I am surrounded by family and friends and yet feel alone, scared and sad.
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