I don't think it is just them, I believe it is us as well. We have changed. We are not the friend that they knew either. Most of my friends have tried and it helps that I throw a lot of parties. But if I am honest, it is me that has pulled away from them. I don't work that hard in fostering the friendship and don't really tell them what I need. There is no way they are capable of giving me the depth that I need right now. Only one person has ever been able to do that and now he is gone. I find the changes sad, but just like any other changes in my life. I will keep navigating through until I land in a comfortable place and hope a few friends are still here when I get there. Like you I have had some surprises, folks I didn't expect to continue on my journey. My very best friend cannot handle my grief. It is too painful for her and I don't have the energy to take care of her. I still love her but our friendship will never be the same. Nothing is permanent as we all know all too well.
