lolamei

Ok, so I've been dating this new guy and, wow, there is a connection and great potential. However - he lives an hour away and has 4 kids...so there are also some pretty big challenges. I have met 3 of the 4. I have one - this feels like a bit of a Brady Bunch scenario! As I was watching him with his kids (11 year old twins, 14 yr old boy, 15 yr old girl - mine is an 11 year old girl)...I was trying to imagine how you combine parenting? How does that even work? I don't think either of us envision that we are looking for a new "mom" or "dad" for our kids - but it would certainly be a mixing of families and combined parenting. It's so baffling to me. My DH and I figured out parenting together as we went. How does this work? Anyone done this? And in his case there is a divorce - so mom is still in the picture... ...I like him so very much, I think it could be worth figuring it out, but WOW!!!! How??????? Curious how others combined families worked out....

My very first foray into Tinder had a match that led with "are you into anal sex"...of course, I had to respond. What followed was a long conversation of me explaining (as a public service announcement) to him perhaps that line would never work...then he confessed he was really looking for a "friends with benefits" scenario. I pointed out that maybe he should try to make a friend first. The best part is that he then awkwardly tried to pretend to be interested in my life....and the last message was him saying "Do you feel like you know me better? Now can we have sex?" Poor poor simple man....amused me for a few days though!

I have no good advice, but just wanted to say DOESN'T DATING SUCK?????? This shit always makes me so resentful that we are in this situation. I remember being so smug with my husband "Thank GOD we never have to figure this dating shit out again...aren't we lucky to have such a strong marriage"...yes, we were!!! It's so hard and so complicated and so painful but being alone forever is such a scary, lonely prospect it seems worth trying...but such a painful process...but also rewarding! That was completely unhelpful except to say I totally know what you are going though...an empathy post, haha!

Oh my god, YES! I totally hear you. Along those same lines - I just was at a work conference and keynote speaker mentioned that her husband had a rare form of cancer and then she said she thought his good attitude helped him actually beat the odds and he is in remission. I wanted to leap up and say FUCK YOU! It has nothing to do with a good attitude. We had a great attitude and a rare form of cancer killed my husband in a month. Don't put that bullshit out there for those of us whose "good attitude" wasn't enough. How about "my husband was REALLY LUCKY"...because that is probably what it was. The rage that welled up so fast sort of took me by surprise, but it's same reaction I have to the "hope" line....