So, my husband and I got into a nasty fight Christmas eve night, very early into Christmas morning he got into a very bad car accident and did not survive, this is all still so fresh to me so of course I'm going through it really bad still. I don't really know what to say right now but that he was my best friend, step father to my children, my everything. Sounds gross but I haven't been able to shower, eat, clean, go to work, sleep, I've never been this depressed and yet angry before. Its the worst feeling I've ever experienced and I'm still just in the beginning. I'm going ti start going to his church and everything he did while he was here. The ONLY thing that has got me so upset is when the pastor told me that when its my time to go to heaven that my husband and I won't be husband and wife anymore, we will be more like brother and sister. That little thing that he said brought me back to what feels like day one of his passing. Now its ten times harder for me to learn how to move forward knowing that.
