MrsT85 Posted September 25, 2015 Share Posted September 25, 2015 On Sunday I will have officially been in my 30s one one month. I was born in smack dab in the middle of the 80s, in late August of 1985. I find myself nodding along whenever I read through one of those "You know you are a child of the 90s if...." lists. Yep - I remember playing with Skip-Its. Polly Pockets. Watching the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle cartoon in my footie pajamas with all of my stuffed animals. But I also find myself nodding along just as enthusiastically when I read articles aimed at people 20+ years my senior. Articles like "Demoted To Lunch: The Underbelly Of Grief" and "The 5 Negative Thoughts You Need To Banish Forever" ("I am not good enough" and "I am not strong enough" and "I am not brave enough" in particular) - both of which are in the "Post 50" section of Huffington Post. I almost never realize that these articles are in that section when I click through from the headline on the main page - they just happen to be topics that interest or speak to me. It puts such a small and cynical smile on my face when I think of the phrase that I still feels best describes me most of the time - "exhausted sad diabetic widow" - and imagine other people picturing some sickly and frail hunched over old lady. Nope. It's me. And at just 30 years old - 27 when I lost him. I'm just so worn out and tired of this being my reality. Thanks (as always) for listening to me whine. I can't really do it anywhere else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted September 25, 2015 Share Posted September 25, 2015 Just wanted to send my virtual support and to say I hear you. I am a decade older, but I feel like I am in my 60s or 70s. In energy level, outlook, wellness... all of these things, I AM decades older. Just wish I was retired to go along with the feeling 60ish so I could rest a bit and properly mourn my husband. ((MrsTim85)) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimiRed Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 {{Hugs}} Yes, completely understand the feeling older than we are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 yes I feel the same , like I have aged ten fold hugs your way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 Hugs. I'll be 41 on Wed, and a lot of the time I feel like I'm 80. (On the other hand, lately, I sometimes feel like I'm 16... wtf??) This wid thing sure messes with your concept of time, sigh... I always think of Douglas Adams: "Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so." Except maybe change "lunchtime" to "wid time... " ((((more hugs)))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biscuit Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 I definitely understand this. I'm only 26, and definitely feel like I'm in my 60s even though my life should just be starting. But honestly, age is just a number. I mean I've had to do and live through things that some people in their 50s haven't even had to tackle...so yea I dont realy consider myself 26 anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hachi Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 I definitely felt this way in the first 18 months to 2 years. One day I looked in the mirror and was utterly shocked at how old and tired I looked. I think it was my eyes. I had a defeated, worn look. Somewhere, I found the motivation to get a facial, a haircut and a massage. That was the beginning of the self-care that I needed so desperately. I tried to stop beating myself up about it and take baby steps. Today, I am just an old soul. The body does recover, eventually, if you let it. But I am not sure you can rush it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twistedmensa Posted October 2, 2015 Share Posted October 2, 2015 My eldest child's father died when I was 31, so I feel some solidarity with you. I felt old at a very young age. I'm 47 now and am approaching 18 months of "official" widowhood. If I felt old before, I feel absolutely ancient now. My face has aged drastically and I barely recognize the reflection in the mirror. I bounced back before and I'm hoping if I'm patient, I'll bounce back again. Though I've found I'm not nearly as elastic at 47 as I was at 31...lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robunknown Posted October 2, 2015 Share Posted October 2, 2015 There is an unfortunate wisdom we were given that most don't have until they are much older. I try to see it as a gift, something that keeps my head into living each day and appreciating life. There is that emotional toll we have to pay for it though which sucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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