This Mother Breaks My Heart

[Guest TheOtherHalf]

Does anyone have their things, odd things, things that you wouldn't expect, really really hurt your heart, or things that impel you to take care of a person who is seemingly innocuous and minding their own business? Some strange things like this strike a deep maternal chord in me, and that chord strikes some deeply rooted primal notes. Inexplicably.

 

Just some examples. My late husband had this habit of sneaking into the kitchen and stuffing his face with bread. I caught him once. Just seeing him do it broke my heart. I went over and took the bread out of his hand and took him into my arms. I told him he should eat the bread with me from  now on, and not alone like that. But he kept eating it alone and breaking my heart.

 

Another time a little girl was being taken care of by her care taker, on a bus. She was very well attended, and very adorable. But the way she let her self be so completely cared for just broke my heart. I wanted to take her home and care for her forever.

 

This mother does the same thing to me. The way she overcompensates for something, I know not what, really breaks my heart.

 

What about you guys? Do you have your odd things that do that to you? What are they?

 

https://ca.style.yahoo.com/post/135004054185/mom-defends-spending-more-than-2k-on-300-gifts

[Portside]

Do you have your odd things that do that to you? What are they?

 

Oh yeah.

 

For the last few years I would occasionally visit my wife's special ed classroom and help out. All the kids are wonderful, of course, but there is one tiny little slip of a thing who would reach out and hold onto my finger for as long as I was there (even if it was for hours). She doesn't speak and, as I understand it, doesn't make eye contact with anyone else. She just sits quietly and colors her papers all day, every day. And that is what she did when I was there, except she held onto me and would not let go. The days I didn't come she stood by the window just looking out - apparently, searching for me.

 

My wife is retired now. Another special ed teacher now has Traci. I don't visit very often. I'm told that sometimes, Traci stands by the door and says "Papa, come?" That's all she will say at school.

 

Somewhere, someone broke that child horribly which adds immeasurably to her severe cognitive difficulties. Her mother is in jail as is Gramma. Great-gramma is her only support.

 

All my babies are grown and living their own lives. One is halfway around the world and one other is fighting in places so grim they fade to black and white in memory but a few moments after you've left. I'm worry about them but they have made their choices and I'm forced to accept it and content myself with that choice.

 

But that little girl suffers unknown troubles everyday and it kills me to not be able to help her.

 

My wife and I tell each other often we are past our child rearing years now.

 

I'm not sure we've convinced one another.  :'(

 

Mike

 

[Guest TheOtherHalf]

The Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack, it hurts the way it touches my heart. I'm putting that on now, and then cleaning.